


Treasure in Plain Sight

by LadyVader



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: (and other bodyparts), Alternate Universe - Human, Anal Fingering, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Catfishing, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Smut, Dick Pics, Dirty Talk, Fingerfucking, Loki's Thirsty For More Than Eggnog, M/M, New Year's Eve, Online Dating, Sexting, Step-Sibling Incest, Written in Ode to Thor's Hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:14:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28034478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyVader/pseuds/LadyVader
Summary: With Thor home from college for the holidays, Loki had been looking forward to spending their time together. Instead, he finds himself catfishing Thor on the local hookup app, and now what started as a joke has left Loki in too deep - and too turned on - to be able to confess to Thor how he really feels for fear of ruining what he already has.(Ridiculous holiday season schmoop 'n smut.)
Relationships: Loki/Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 56
Kudos: 219





	Treasure in Plain Sight

**Author's Note:**

> Pre fic warning: There will be no text speak, I'm too old for that shit, so Thor & Loki will have been raised to slide into a person's DM's in a grammatically correct manner dammit :P
> 
> Many thanks to my awesome beta @theskyandsea, thank you for being willing to dive out of my lockdown fic into vampire fics and then into Christmas fics and back again at the whim of my idiotic hormones <3 you've been a saint!

**Treasure in Plain Sight:**

Cackling quietly to himself as Bruce Willis quipped and punched his way through _Nakatomi Plaza_ in the background, Loki uploaded _Serrure’s_ user pic onto her freshly made profile for the _Tilslutte_ dating app and grinned smugly to himself.

He’d chosen a pic of himself from Halloween, his Harley Quinn pigtails long gone, the blonde wig almost as fun as his own hair to fling about as he’d drunkenly bounced and laughed alongside Sigyn. He’d been laughing -- his face slightly blurry as he and Sigyn swung each other around in circles -- and when run through Face App, it gave his female doppelganger a distinct _party girl_ air, his blonde locks flying, his face smaller and delicate even as his wide smile made him look far more human than he’d ever normally allow.

It was one of his favourite pictures. He’d jealously hoarded it to himself until tonight, so now -- with Sigyn cropped out just this once, for the purposes of revenge -- he could barely recognise himself in the original, let alone as his new _Manic Pixie Dream Girl_ persona.

_Serrure_ was in town for the holidays, she just wanted to party and have fun without the preconceived ideas of patriarchal ownership hanging over her like a noose. She believed life was to be enjoyed at every moment, and screw whether it was Christmas, _Serrure_ needed to get LAID over the holidays.

Within moments, Victor Von Doom had sleazed his way into Serrure’s DM’s.

Loki smiled and heard the trap snap shut.

Break _his_ Sigyn’s heart, would he? Dump her for that bloody Sue girl who didn’t even care if he was alive or dead? Loki didn’t fucking think so.

It was depressingly easy to ensnare Doom after that.

Serrure was highly enthusiastic to hear all about Victor’s car and trust fund, and Loki was obliging enough to send over a cropped picture of some tits to get the fuckwit’s motor running. Soon enough, Loki was in exceedingly repulsed possession of a Von Doom dick pic, complete with Victor pulling some sort of face that Loki _assumed_ the idiot thought was sexy. It was more than proof enough that the tiny dick in question belonged to none other than their schools own twattish Latverian student.

He’d wait and post it their first day back in the new year, he wanted Sigyn to be able to witness his humiliation the way he’d laughed his way through hers, having slut-shamed her far and wide.

Loki was about to shut down _Tilslutte_ \-- Serrure was proving to be so popular that he was going to have a veritable library of unsolicited dick pics -- when his eyes suddenly caught on a picture in the constantly refreshing stream of photos at the side of his screen.

_Singles in Your Area_.

Loki almost choked on his own inhaled breath.

_Thor?_

His eyes flew to where Thor was sitting in the other armchair across their living room, their parents snuggled together on the sofa between them, all of them watching _Die Hard_ for the 6th Christmas in a row… well, since they’d become a single-family unit, anyway.

Loki had been adopted by Odin almost the very moment that the search for his mother -- an odd term for a woman who’d left her newborn to die in a cardboard box in an alleyway in winter, Loki had always thought -- had been closed. For years it had just been the two of them, and it had never occurred to Loki to want a mother or siblings. Odin had found him in that alley when out on patrol, and he had been his world, and vice versa, for just over a decade. Then had come an attempted robbery, and Odin had fallen utterly and completely for the florist who’d knocked out her would-be robber by beating him soundly with an oversized succulent.

After seven years of knowing her, and six years of having her as his entirely wonderful and loving stepmother, it was still Loki’s favourite thing about Frigga.

_Thor,_ however, had been an acquired taste.

Neither of them had ever expected a stepbrother to drop suddenly into their lives out of the blue, and their first year or so had been fraught. Still, they had found their own balance over the years and -- if Loki was honest, which he frequently chose not to be -- Thor was basically his favourite person, alongside Sigyn.

A family could be the people you were stuck with, but it could also be the people you chose for yourself and valued above all others.

Loki was stuck with a stepbrother, sure. He didn’t _have_ to quietly adore him the way he did, and Loki certainly didn’t _have_ to miss Thor desperately the way he had ever since Thor started college, not that he’d felt inclined to let the bloody great git know that.

Biting the inside of his cheek, Loki fought the urge to cackle evilly once more.

Why mess with one irritating blowhard when you could mess with two? True, Thor was annoyingly difficult to embarrass, but that didn’t mean Loki couldn’t give it a try.

_Serrure_ clicked on Thor’s profile, and Loki felt something clench low in his belly at the selection of photos of Thor gleaming sweatily playing one sport or another, smiling his sunshine smile and basically looking every inch the excruciatingly hot sex god Loki had had to force himself to not lust over for a number of years now.

_Hi, I’m Thor. I just got out of a long term relationship, and I’m not looking for another right now. Just hoping for a fun, casual connection._

Loki rolled his eyes and scoffed inwardly.

Thor and Jane had gone out for one summer and been nauseating the whole time. It had almost entirely ruined Loki’s last summer with Thor before he’d headed off for college, and now it looked like he was still nauseating even on a casual hook up app.

Loki glanced back towards Thor who was on his phone again… as he had been, for the most part ever since he’d got home the day before.

Great. Thor was barely home, and already he was planning to ditch Loki for whatever desperate floozy caught his eye.

Something clicked into place in Loki’s head.

Two birds, one stone -- he could stop Thor ditching him if he could hold his interest long enough to stop him running out on Loki, and could maybe even find a way to have a good giggle at his expense as he did so!

Loki’s sudden sense of glee was nipped quickly in the bud as he noticed that Thor was still idly swiping at his phone as he watched the film.

He must be getting inundated with offers, even with that cheesy AF profile page, Loki mused, scrolling through Thor’s profile pictures, sadly all too aware of how Thor drew admiring gazes no matter where they went.

He was stupidly beautiful, and _built_ , and actually quite funny if you weren’t taken in by his seemingly vanilla exterior and… off-limits, frustratingly, hideously, life ruining-ly off bloody limits.

Loki’s mind wandered slightly further afield than he usually let it.

Perhaps he didn’t have to DM Thor for blackmail material…. Perhaps it could purely be -- very casually, not _at all_ world-shatteringly -- for the spank bank?

Swallowing, Loki opened up the messaging section and started typing before his higher brain functions could kick back in and stop him.

**{ _Fuck, please tell me your hands are as big as they look in that photo of you in the blue sweater._ }**

Out of the corner of his eye, he watched as Thor paused in his lazy swiping (all left, Loki’s hindbrain giddily told him before he could stamp it down) and tapped at his screen, seemingly selecting rather than dismissing for once.

_Please be Serrure_ , Loki’s inner voice croaked even as his stomach turned somersaults and he berated himself for not finding more pictures. His one blurry femme photo might be enough to fool Victor, but a profile with just a single image to sell himself might seem a little suspect to Thor.

Thor appeared to be typing, and Loki made himself look at the TV screen with such force that his eyes stung and watered.

After a few minutes of John McClane repeatedly almost dying, Loki leaned forward, snagging one of Frigga’s amazing gingerbread Santa’s from the plate on the coffee table before sitting back to ever so casually take a drink and a bite and then just, without any particular care in the world, check his phone.

**[I guess that would depend on how big you think they look?]**

Loki finished his gingerbread Santa with shaking fingers.

**{ _Like there’s no way you could fit all four fingers in me, no matter how much I want to feel your knuckles spread me wide._ }**

He took a sip of his drink and watched as Thor’s eyes widened and then closed for several long seconds.

Too much? Not enough?

Loki quickly messaged him again before Thor could think to reject them… her… _Him_.

**_{Not that it would stop me trying, though.}_ **

**[That’s good to know]** Thor answered quickly and only Loki’s many years of looking innocent after pulling some horrific prank or another kept him from jumping up to run a victory lap around the room.

(Or from diving into Thor’s lap and blowing the whole thing completely).

**_{I guess I shouldn’t be surprised},_** Loki imagined Serrure purring to Thor’s profile picture, **{ _your user pics do paint a really very specific picture - you’re a big guy in general, huh?}_**

Loki heard Thor snort softly and fought hard to not react.

**[I like to think I’m in proportion if that’s what you’re asking, yeah.]**

Swallowing, Loki made a point of asking what time they were supposed to be headed out in the morning again as if Frigga hadn’t told them at dinner to be ready to leave for Nana Bestla’s at 9 am, nodding and slumping back like arousal wasn’t fizzing in his veins.

“I might head up early, make sure I don’t sleep through my alarm.”

It had seemed like an innocuous lie as it had passed his lips, but Thor’s focus swung to him, bright and immobilising like being caught by the Eye of Sauron.

“You’re going to bed before the bracelet bit? That’s your favourite part?”

Loki shook himself, grinning sharply at Thor’s disbelieving expression. “You’re right, what was I thinking? Although, if I need to be dragged out of bed tomorrow morning I’m blaming you,” Loki gestured towards their tolerantly amused parents, “You both saw it. I tried to be responsible, and Thor ruined it.”

Thor held one hand up, his other palm placed over his heart. “I hereby swear to drag you hissing and spitting from your cocoon should you not emerge in time to leave for lunch.”

“I’m holding you to that, college boy,” Loki quipped, and almost managed to block the mental image of Thor coming to his room in the morning to join him under the covers instead.

**_{In proportion like too long to shove down my throat or too fat to fit in my ass?}_ **

He briefly wondered if he should have said pussy, but the thrill of imagining Thor wondering -- however inadvertently -- if his dick would fit inside Loki’s proffered orifices was just far too heady to tamper with, for the moment.

Loki’s eyes watered with the effort of focusing on the tv and trying to keep Thor clear at his periphery all at once. Thor grinned suddenly, tamping it down to the tiniest smirk almost as swiftly as his original satisfaction had shone through, and Loki reminded himself why underestimating Thor was a bad idea. There was _always_ more going on under the hood than the sunny puppy dog smile would suggest.

**[Proportional like… Both, I’d say. But I’m pretty sure your ass couldn’t take me.]**

He couldn’t remember why he thought this would be a good idea, the effort of not squirming in his chair only seemed to make _more_ blood pool in Loki’s lap. He had a momentary horror that he‘d be unable to keep his erection hidden and somehow his parents would see it, and Frigga would be understanding which would only make things _worse_ and… _oh well, at least that helped_.

Loki paused long enough to look suitably gleeful over Gruber’s poor choice in handholds, before typing out a response with trembling fingertips.

**_{The funny thing about me is that whenever someone tells me I CAN’T do something, it only makes me want to do it more.}_ **

There was a quiet moment as Odin shut off the TV and Loki heard Thor’s throat click as he swallowed heavily, and knew then and there he was going to have to run interference the whole of the Christmas break. There was no way in hell he could share this feeling with some thirsty skank, not when this was the only moment Loki would ever have to bask in the (semi-skewed) sensation of being wanted like this by Thor.

**[Well, in that case, you definitely can’t sit on my hand, my face, or my cock.]**

_Fuckfuckfuuuuuuck_

Loki cleared his throat.

“Well, having consumed my own weight in gingerbread cookies, I’ll be off to bed I think.” He gave the room a vague smile, still carefully not looking directly Thor’s way. “Need to sleep all of this off to make room for the 19 or so different desserts Nana Bestla will have made in her attempts to woo Thor once more.”

Odin grumbled half-heartedly about Loki showing his grandmother some respect, but Thor ruined the effect by beaming smugly at them all.

“I can’t help being her favourite, besides it's good for them, keeps Bor on his toes, thinking I might yet swoop in and steal Bestla off him.”

Shuddering dramatically and muttering about how there was still time yet to burn a certain stepson’s Christmas gifts, Odin shuffled off to bed, with Frigga following in his wake, still giggling.

Loki turned to Thor, his throat clicking as he watched him gather up the few plates and glasses they’d used, moving into the kitchen to put away the remaining cookies with every appearance of readying himself to head up to bed, just as Loki was.

“You, ah not heading out to Fandral’s party then?” Loki asked, knowing full well that it wasn’t until the next night.

Thor shrugged. “Nah, I mean it's tomorrow anyway, but I wouldn’t want to head to the grandparents hungover, and besides Fan’s trying to see if his college guy status will help him out with the cheerleaders he missed last year, and I do _not_ want in on his high school reunion shit.” They moved back through the house, switching lights off as they went until it became only natural for them to walk up the stairs in sync with each other, the old patterns coming naturally to them. “It’ll be nice to see Volstagg and Hogun, even Sif if she can get away, but that’s it really. I’ve only got a week or so here, don’t want to get too tied up in the same old shit, y’know?”

Loki gave him an arched brow, his tone icier than he’d intended with his blood still hot from Thor’s messages, the disparity between being wanted and rejected enough to make his heart struggle against his ribs. “Oh, well, then don’t let me keep you.”

He made as though to storm away towards his room, but Thor caught him by an elbow, his expression aggravatingly fond and warmly amused all at once.

“C’mon Lo, don’t be daft. You know I don’t mean you. I want to catch up with a few friends, _maybe_ party a little bit, but otherwise, I want to spend my time with _you_. I’ve missed you, you pain in the ass.”

Loki wanted to pout and ask why he was trawling the casual hook up sites if he wanted to spend time with him so badly but reminded himself that until this evening, Loki hadn’t even let it fully cross his mind that he could be allowed to want Thor’s attention that way.

He rolled his eyes, blushing and pretending to be less delighted (and conflicted) than he was.

“Well then, I guess as long as I don’t count as _the same old shit_ , then I guess we can hang out.”

Thor released Loki’s elbow to take him by his nape and shook him gently.

“Go to bed and get some sleep, you insecure bloody weirdo,” he teased, already turning away with no idea just how exactly his words hit home.

Loki watched Thor walking towards his room, a pang striking somewhere behind his lungs, only for his heart to start beating in triple time as he watched Thor pull his phone from his pocket, staring down at it as he disappeared into his room.

“Oh my God, I didn’t answer him,” he squeaked, and shot into his own room, kicking his door shut behind him and fumbling for his phone.

_Shitshitshit, what was he supposed to say now?_

He didn’t think Thor was likely to sneak out now, but Thor had been on that site for a reason, Loki couldn’t just disappear, or some bitch would swoop in and scoop him up.

**_{We’ll see about that}_** , he typed out, hoping it sounded determined enough to keep Thor on the hook.

**[Yeah we will ;)]** Thor responded, and Loki was torn between arousal and agitation, not wanting Thor to seek anyone else out, but needing to stop him leaving the house to meet up with his fictional self.

Serrure’s inbox lit up again.

**[But I’m afraid neither my hand, face nor cock are available for sitting on tonight, sorry beautiful.]**

Loki grinned savagely in triumph. Thor wasn’t planning on sneaking out, not that he’d ever been covert enough to have made an attempt in the first place.

His smile faded. _Serrure_ wouldn’t know that though, technically he imagined she’d be dismissing Thor and going off to see who would be _obliging_ enough to satisfy her tonight.

**_{Oh, I see. Double booked are we? Classy.}_ **

It occurred to Loki only after he sent it that it’s precisely what he would have said (and he _had_ said it, gods this was getting confusing already) and perhaps he should be trying harder to not sound like himself, but…

He sighed.

But frankly, it was just too heady and wonderful knowing that Thor hadn’t swiped him away, that he’d been drawn to some form of Loki, no matter how fake, and to have him _want him_ \-- be as hot for Loki’s words as Loki was for Thor’s -- was just too good to give up.

It was just going to have to be Loki’s Christmas gift to himself this year.

He was going to allow himself this, the fake account, the real feelings and desires, and then he’d just have to deal with the fallout later.

Loki’s mind skittered away from the idea of Thor being sad over being stood up for a hook up by some girl who didn’t actually exist, the guilt pushed aside as his inbox flashed.

**[Is that jealousy I see there? That’s kind of hot ;P Actually I’m only home for the holiday break, so I have some family time booked, tonight ended up being one of those times… And just so you know, almost everyone I’ve seen on this app is either someone I went to school with or knew from around here. Not really what I was looking for in a no-strings hook up. Can’t tell you how good it was to see the gorgeous girl who wants to sit on my hand wasn’t someone I knew, but someone I’d really LIKE to get to know, y’know?]**

From Thor, whose idea of a heartfelt agreement was ‘ok’, this was a veritable essay.

Loki was offended on Serrure’s behalf - she was clearly too hot to be a last resort, she was _him_ dammit -- but also delighted. No wonder Thor had been swiping away so many likely highly enthusiastic offers. Unlike Fandral’s quest to nail every cheerleader he’d missed his senior year, Thor had no desire to revisit his prior conquests. It must be like shooting fish in a barrel, Loki supposed, he knew how it had aggravated Thor that the local girls had thrown themselves at him no matter who he happened to be dating at the time. Sif had been amused by it, but then they’d never really been more than friends with benefits, but Loki knew it had bothered Jane.

**_{Oh, so if I’d happened to be local rather than just here for the holidays myself you wouldn’t have deigned to answer my message?}_ **

Loki liked to imagine Thor was panicking in his room right about then, trying to pull his foot out of his mouth, and picturing his chances of getting any crumbling to dust before his very eyes.

**[Oh, I think if you’d been local, we’d have already known how much you could take of me.]**

Loki squirmed, delightfully surprised.

_Presumptuous asshole._

**_{Presumptuous… you’re right, though. You’re presumptuous, but you’re right.}_ **

**[So, you’re around for a while then? Am I going to need to get in line if I wanted to meet up in between holiday and family stuff?]**

Loki took a moment to think about whether he wanted Thor jealously chasing him or confidently promising him the ride of his life.

**_{I suppose I can afford to be a little patient, just so long as you promise to be worth the wait?}_ **

Loki stripped and slipped into bed, his belly tight and trembling with anticipation, his cock rising to press back against him at just the _idea_ of Thor being across the way in his own bed, possibly even hard as well, possibly even thinking of him.

_Not that he knew it was him_.

Loki shoved the thought away.

This was his little slice of fantasy dammit, he wouldn’t be denied it, not even by himself.

His phone lit up.

**[If you wait for me I’ll give you whatever you want as many times as you want it.]**

Loki’s thoughts dissipated in a puff of steam, his brain cells sizzling as he let himself dwell on just exactly what it would be like to ask Thor for what he wanted from him and _get it_.

His inbox blinked again.

**[And, just to make sure I wasn’t misrepresenting myself to you, I checked, and for the record, I think my dick makes my hands look small… ;)]**

Dropping his phone, Loki muffled his groan in his pillow and proceeded to fuck his fist -- too fast, too dry, too _hard_ dammit -- because _Thor_ , his Thor, his stupidly wonderful, _beautiful_ Thor, really _was_ in his room, hard and wanting him.

Loki ruined his sheets in what would have been an embarrassingly short time, had he not already endured the exquisite torture that had been Thor informing him his dick would never fit inside him, so really all things considered he was quite proud of himself for lasting _this_ long.

He rolled onto his back, panting and wiping his sticky fingers on the already wrecked bed linen, and reached for his phone.

**_{Well that was a really rather lovely thought to take into the shower with me… thanks for that, I’ll sleep well now.}_ **

**[You’re entirely welcome]** Thor shot back almost immediately. **[Don’t suppose I could get one (a shower selfie perhaps? :P) to take to bed with me to help me sleep?]**

Loki stormed through the possibilities in his mind, desperately wishing he’d had more time to set _Serrure_ up with rather more than the one tantalising image. He pondered briefly if there was a way to snap just the crease where his leg met his hip, but there wasn’t time enough to find a pose that would minimise the leanness of his form, and he was _damned_ if he was sending Thor the cropped tits pic he’d used to ensnare Victor.

If Thor was going to beat off thinking of Loki then it sure as fuck wasn’t going to be to a picture that wasn’t even _him_.

**_{Nice try pretty boy, but I don’t just send incriminating photos to every hot guy with a hard-on he promises is just for me. But I will say this - I did have a VERY nice time considering just where I’d want you to stick it in the most.}_ **

**[Andwehre’s thatt]**

Loki squirmed again, biting his hand to keep from groaning loud enough to be heard.

Fast reply, sloppy and misspelled? Seems like Thor’s hands were possibly a little too busy to keep up a messaging conversation at the moment… how _delightful_.

**_{Anywhere and everywhere you want.}_ **

There came a distant _thud,_ and Loki cackled quietly to himself, hoping it meant Thor had come so hard he’d smacked his skull on the headboard.

**_{Sweet Dreams}_** he sent quickly, then forced himself to set his phone to _Do Not Disturb_ , and settled back against his damp sheets, to dream of whatever Thor had been thinking of doing to him that made such an impact.

++

There were particular sounds and smells that Loki always associated with being at his grandparents’ house.

There was the odd click Nana Bestla’s favourite crockery made as the bowls and plates jostled up against each other as she added more and more dishes to the table in her ongoing attempts to fatten Loki up.

There was an undertone of bacon at all times, from Grandpa Bor’s daily bacon sandwich, as well as the lingering pungency of cabbage (always alarming because Nana had gone for parsnips and sprouts this year to accompany her famous Christmas Eve lunch) and under all of it, the sweet smell of ‘Youth Dew’, the scent of it such a reminder of every covetous hug and adoring, biased accolade that just walking through the door into their house was a comfort to Loki.

But not _today_ , it seemed.

“Thor, you dreadful philanderer, you! That’s the tenth time I’ve seen you check your phone in the last two minutes, you’ve gone and got yourself a girlfriend again haven’t you? Oh, it’s enough to break a poor old woman’s heart!”

Loki couldn’t help but grin as Thor flushed, and Odin shifted in his seat like he was the embarrassed teenager, quietly imploring his mother to ‘leave the poor boy alone’.

“It’s nothing,” Thor beamed at her despite his reddening cheeks, “just flirting. You’re the only one for me, Bestla -- I keep telling Bor I’ll fight him for you, but he won’t take me on.”

Bor started in on his habitual response of how very much he would like Thor to take her off his hands. As the hubbub began to build towards its natural crescendo (that no one could burn bacon just right but Bestla, so he might as well keep her after all) Loki took advantage of the moment to quickly snatch up his own phone.

Thor really had been checking his phone a lot, it would be cruel to let him think he’d been forgotten already.

**_{Ugh, I forgot how much of this holiday is being dragged to places you don’t want to go… I’m afraid I’m basically booked up until New Years, pretty boy. You still good to wait for me?}_ **

Loki snuck his phone back into his pocket just in time to hear Nana Bestla sadly proclaim she’d best leave Thor to his hussy after all (for now, at least) and to watch Thor’s eyes fall to his phone, lighting up next to his heavily laden plate atop the dinner table.

Making a point of _not_ watching as Thor checked it, Loki drew Bor into a conversation about his buddies from the allotments. He happily made his way through his plate catching up on the shenanigans of old Tyr and his grandfather’s other cronies who, it had always seemed to Loki, bickered and gossiped far worse than Bestla’s knitting circle could ever hope to.

He waited until everyone was raptly listening to a story about Odin’s golf buddies that he’d already heard three times to sneak his own phone back out, holding it just under the edge of the table and checking that Thor’s eyes were on Odin before continuing.

He unlocked the phone and opened the app, Serrure’s inbox unsurprisingly lit up to show two new messages.

**[Works for me,]** Thor had sent, followed by **[I can’t think of a better way to start the New Year than watching you come screaming for me, stuffed full of my dick.]**

In hindsight, it had _not_ been a good idea to feign normalcy by lifting his glass for a drink right at the same time he’d checked his messages.

Loki choked, his water surging up his nose, burning and stinging, blinded by his own tears as he fought to cough it free, his phone dropping to the wooden floor with a hollow clatter.

“You’re alright, boy.” Bor commanded rather than comforted him, a heavy fist pounding between Loki’s shoulder blades, “Cough up chicken, there’s a lad.”

Loki finally managed to splutter his way to a clear breath, blinking his watering eyes enough to see Frigga and Odin on their feet, Thor only a few paces behind Bor, his brows drawn together in consternation.

“I’m okay, people.” Loki croaked, holding his hands up and smiling weakly. “Nothing to see but an adult still yet to master the subtle art of breathing and or swallowing. I’m fine, it’s okay.”

He waited until Frigga had stopped fussing over him and the table and settled into something closer to normalcy once again before sneaking a fearful glance towards where his phone lay on the floor.

Loki slumped, sighing with relief.

His phone had survived, which meant Serrure yet lived, which meant Loki would have chance enough later to reread Thor’s last message over and over until he came so hard his eyes crossed.

Loki snuck a quick look Thor’s way from underneath his lashes, caught him checking his phone once again. He’d have to wait until they were home for Loki to give him an adequate response, but there was no way in hell Loki was risking sexting Thor from his grandmother’s dinner table.

Thor would simply have to wait.

++

**_{What, you think I’m skipping straight to dessert after starving myself for days?}_ **

Loki had excused himself to go and sleep off his dinner, following Thor’s example after he had spent the majority of the drive home curled against the window. He’d been sleeping deeply enough that Loki had been able to freely read back through their messages, planning his responses even as he kept up an idly polite conversation with Frigga about her plans for New Year’s Day.

Now he was curled up in his freshly changed sheets, hoping that Thor felt like dragging things out in anticipation of the event he had no idea was sadly to never occur.

Thor must have still been sleepy himself because Loki was able to get a good forty minutes of roast dinner induced coma before some quiet sixth sense stirred him to find he’d had a new message only seconds before.

**[You say that like dessert’s a bad thing… What were 'you' thinking?]**

Loki took a moment to grieve his inability to ask for Thor’s pretty lips on his own cock before summarily dismissing his male form from his mental images, imagining himself to be the one that Thor actually wanted.

**_{I’m not against dessert per se… I just might be too hungry for just one option by then… maybe a little finger food… maybe an all you can eat buffet?}_ **

**[Sounds like you’re worried I’m not as hungry for it as you will be by then… but I’m already starving.]**

Loki burrowed deeper into his bedding and fought to contain himself.

**_{Food metaphors aside, I’ve been fucking famished ever since I saw those hands of yours last night.}_ **

**[Got a real thing for my hands, huh?]**

**_{If by ‘a real thing’ you mean I couldn’t decide last night if I wanted them covering my mouth as you shove your dick inside me, or if I’d rather be helplessly squirming on them like your little sex puppet, then yeah, I guess I admit to a certain appreciation for them and your other purported proportions.}_ **

**[Sounds like you need the best of both worlds]**

Frowning, Loki tried to make sense of Thor’s words, but his brain had ceded almost all control to his dick by this point.

**_{Sounds promising - explain?}_ **

Loki rolled onto his stomach, grinding his erection into his mattress with something close enough to a whine that he felt his ears go red, both thrilled and humiliated by the thought of Thor seeing him so needy; writhing on his belly from desperation for Thor’s touch.

**[I was thinking you could ride my fingers (since you’re such a fan) while I shove my prick deep in your ass and cover your mouth with the other hand - covers all the bases and stops the neighbours thinking I’m killing you when you scream with your pussy stuffed full of my fingers and my cock too big for your ass. Sound like a plan to you?]**

Loki sobbed.

He didn’t know if it was because he _wanted it_ so much, or because he knew he couldn’t _have it_.

He rolled his hips against the bed, already at peace with the fact he was going to have to get changed, already leaking copiously from just the friction and Thor’s starkly stated intentions, only to still suddenly at a brisk but gentle knock at his door.

“You awake, Lo?”

_No, no-no-no-no-no-no not NOW dammit!_

Loki rolled onto his back and was sitting up, duvet covering him almost to his chest, knees drawn up inside his cocoon by the time Thor cracked the door open.

“Yeah’m up,” Loki yawned, faking a sleepy smile and hoped like hell that Thor would attribute his frazzled appearance to his recent food coma. “What do you need?”

Thor ambled in on bare feet, and somehow just the sight of his warm, golden skin on feet that had no doubt been tucked up in Thor’s own big bed only minutes previously, was enough to have Loki’s dick leaping beneath its duvet camouflage.

Thor looked sleepy but serious as he strolled over, taking up a perch at the edge of Loki’s bed and some panicked inner voice wondered at the back of Loki’s brain if Thor would be able to _smell_ how much he wanted him, sat so close but so inherently out of reach.

“Uh, you okay there, Lo? You look all red and sweaty?”

Loki blinked rapidly, his cock stubbornly refusing to shrink beneath the blankets.

“I’m fine, just a bit overheated from the mid-afternoon nap, y’know? Got a bit _too_ snuggly.”

Thor took this in with a raised eyebrow and a slow nod, before continuing.

“Okay then, uh… I just wanted to ask what the plans are, for New Year’s I mean. I know the intention was to do something together, but I didn’t know if we had anything set in stone…?”

_Ah, I’m being ditched so he can go fuck fictional me._

Loki smiled, annoyed with himself for being hurt despite the fact he’d set the situation up for Thor to fail him.

“Uhm, yeah -- I don’t think we had arranged anything specific. I know your Mum really wanted us to all go to that big do down at Vanaheim, but Sigyn mentioned not wanting to go to Amora’s party by herself since Doom humiliated her, so I’m not actually sure what I’m doing yet? Did you have something in mind?”

Thor shrugged. “Not really, I had an invite from a hot girl, but I wanted to make sure it was cool, I’ve only got the week here with you guys. I don’t want to miss out on any Thor and Loki time if you had anything planned.”

“That’s _Loki and Thor_ time, for a start--” Thor snorted and shoved at Loki’s knees, “-- and no, nothing planned. I guess I can spare you to a hot girl for five minutes while I’m playing bodyguard. Besides, I get you all tomorrow and the day after, right?”

“Well, I’ve got to go swap presents with Sif and the three amigos, but otherwise I’m all yours.” He smiled and patted Loki’s knees, rising with no clue just how his words struck at Loki’s heart.

“Sounds good,” he managed to force out, and Thor paused at his door, turning back to Loki.

“Oh I forgot, Mum says she’s talked Odin into letting us pick the evening’s entertainment, so hurry up and come downstairs before I cast my vote with Dad for anything involving Clint Eastwood or John Wayne.”

Loki only just remembered at the last moment that the only thing hiding his perversions from his beloved stepbrother was the bundle of bedding in his lap. He managed to stop himself at merely bolting upright, rather than flinging himself out of bed to chase Thor down.

“You wouldn’t _dare_!” He hissed, and Thor grinned back, wide and bright and worryingly vicious for him.

“Oh, _wouldn’t_ I?” Thor waggled his eyebrows before bolting out through the door.

Loki swore viciously to himself and snatched up his phone and forced himself to visualise what it would be like if Nana Bestla finally got her way and got the ‘proper smooch’ off of Thor that she’d always jokingly wanted.

He shuddered and gratefully felt himself finally begin to deflate.

**_{You utter bastard}_** he typed frantically, unwilling to spend his Christmas Eve trapped in the old west. **_{I’m committed to festive bullshit for the rest of the day, it’ll be ages before I have a chance to get myself off thinking about that! I hope you’re happy!_**

**[Hey, you wanted an explanation ;P]** Thor smarmed back as Loki was splashing his face **[Have a great Christmas Eve, I hope you get everything you want… eventually]**

**_{Oh, I’m planning on it...}_** Loki paused at the top of the stairs, checking to make sure his hard-on was definitely no longer noticeable, closed the _Tilslutte_ app down completely, and forced himself downstairs to be festive.

++

Christmas day was both even more awkward than Loki had feared, but also far more enjoyable than he had expected, all at once.

They had agreed on a compromise the night before, watching _Firefly_ to meet Thor and Odin’s cowboy vibe needs whilst satisfying Frigga’s craving for strong female characters and Loki’s preference for anything not involving John Wayne or Clint Eastwood.

It had been hard to not re-open the app, he’d been hungrier for Thor’s attention than he’d realised, but -- to his unexpected delight -- Thor had been in a softer, sillier mood than he’d expected.

It had begun when Loki had found Thor’s eyes on him each time he looked up… which had obviously led to trying to catch him… which had then led to throwing nuts and candy at each other without being seen… which had then obviously culminated in both of them smiling innocently, bright wrappers in their hair and chunks of walnut littering the floor between them as they denied all knowledge of any such battles.

Loki had caught Thor looking at him again even afterwards, only that time he smiled warmly, and Loki remembered again with a pang just how wonderful he was, with or without sexting.

Christmas morning had passed mostly as expected.

They rose late (well, late by Odin’s standards) and set about getting everything ready for their Christmas feast, not retiring to the bright tumble of carefully wrapped gifts beneath the tree until the bird was in the oven.

It was -- as you’d expect -- a delightful time. Nana Bestla had once again knitted them their own sweaters, and Loki’s was of a wool so soft and fine that he couldn’t help but immediately shrug out of his top just to feel the gentle brush of the fabric against his bare skin. He’d caught Thor watching him, his own a ridiculously bold red the same colour he’d blushingly adored the first Christmas she’d made a family sweater for him. Thor had always asked for the same again each time he outgrew the last, somehow making the style (best suited to his 12-year-old self) work for him year after year.

“See something you like?” Loki had grinned, smoothing his hands over the deep racing green skating over his skin. “You finally ready to embrace a shade that doesn’t make you look like a walking fire engine?”

Thor had hugged his sweater back against himself as though Loki had threatened to tear it from his person (and maybe he was onto something there), looking outraged. “ _Never_ ,” he’d sworn fervently before settling down again, “yours looks great though. Suits you.”

Loki had had to take a large swallow of his Christmas coffee (Odin’s recipe, just a standard mocha with a slug of Baileys in it) to excuse the way the blood had rushed into his cheeks under Thor’s admiring gaze.

Honestly, one day of dirty messaging and Loki was all but ready to cast himself at Thor’s feet and _beg him_ to touch him. He never should have let himself lift the lid off of these feelings, he wasn’t anything like as adept in hiding them as he was his standard adoration of the giant git… and even that had an unfortunate habit of leaking out at the most inconvenient moments.

It had come to the point where they had each gone through their main gifts as well as the silly gifts they bought each other just because it made them smile, or smaller ones sent from friends, and Loki had yet to come across his gift from Thor.

Loki smiled at where Frigga was still in raptures over the rare bonsai Odin had surprised her with and picked up what he’d assumed was a card for him, recognising Thor’s handwriting as he looked closely at it.

_Ah, a gift certificate then._ It made sense, Thor was in his first year of college and Loki knew he was likely saving every penny he had, and resolutely did not allow himself to revisit the hours he’d spent searching for _just_ the right gift for Thor, because it was the thought that counted, not the time or expense or…

Something fell out and clattered to the floor as Loki split the envelope open, and Loki glanced down in confusion, his eyes rising to meet Thor’s oddly nervous ones before he dipped the scoop up his mystery gift.

It was a key ring, with two keys hanging from it, silver and shiny and utterly baffling.

“There’s… the rest,” Thor grinned, oddly pink and sheepish, “in the envelope I mean… though now I kind of feel like it’s a present for me really, but I mean if you…”

Thor’s words carried on, but Loki couldn’t make them out past the rushing in his ears as he stared at the piece of card he’d drawn free of the envelope.

It was a travel pass, good for at least 30 journeys between Asgard and Midgard, from home to MCU to see Thor and back again as many times as he could fit in before he joined him there himself.

Loki’s fingers started to shake around the card, and he didn’t dare to look up, even as he felt Thor move to stand closer.

“The, uh, keys are for my dorm and my room. I cleared it with Steve, he spends half his life with Barnes anyway so it wouldn’t have mattered to me even if he had objected, but he’s cool with it, any weekend you want, any time you want really… I mean, if you want?”

Loki dropped the card and keys and stepped directly into Thor’s arms. Winding his own around Thor in turn, Loki hiccupped against his throat, hiding his face in the soft fall of Thor’s hair.

“I know it’s a bit of a selfish gift,” Thor said quietly, his lips pressed practically against the shell of Loki’s ear, “I just really miss you, you know?”

“Shut _up_ ,” Loki finally managed, categorically _not_ crying, and witnessed a Christmas miracle then and there as Thor obeyed him and fell silent. Loki could feel him smiling against him as he stood and rocked them both gently as their parents sensibly ignored them, making overly loud conversation about the different types of bonsai until Loki finally felt composed enough to step away from Thor.

“You realise I’m going to visit so much you’ll be sick of me,” he said haughtily, scooping up his gifts again as though his eyes and nose weren’t pink and Thor gave him a tolerantly amused look.

“We’ll see,” he scoffed gently, and relief ran through Loki, reminding him that no matter what happened with the sexting, he could never actually lose Thor.

This was just a silly little game he was playing with himself, playing chicken with his own feelings.

Thor might be disappointed, but he wouldn’t be hurt, and Loki _might_ get hurt, but he got to keep Thor no matter what, and that was more than enough.

++

_Okay, so it wasn’t quite enough._

Loki had refused to even let himself look back through their messages the day before, before shamefully wrenching several orgasms out of himself that night, torn between the memories of Thor’s messages, and Thor’s arms tight about him.

They’d agreed to help out with Frigga’s deliveries, staggering them with her regular staff so that they all had time enough to celebrate and see their families over the holiday week, so Loki had spent a fair portion of the day after Christmas rushing around in the delivery van, while Thor took deliveries in his car.

Loki liked to think if he’d spent more time with Thor that day that he’d have had inner strength enough to wait until Thor messaged him next, but _dammit_ , Loki only had a few days to let himself roll around in this feeling before he had to give it up again, and he’d already not spoken to Thor (like _that)_ for all of Christmas day!

**_{Not gonna lie}_** he couldn’t help but send to Thor once he was back home again, still waiting for Frigga and Thor to get in, as Odin bustled about the kitchen arranging leftovers, **_{I was really disappointed to find out that Santa really doesn’t exist… otherwise I’d have found you under my tree yesterday morning.}_**

Thor must have still been busy with deliveries because it took him a good hour to respond.

**[Maybe he only brings presents to people not on his naughty list?]**

**_{How dare you, I’ll have you know I’m DEFINITELY on the nice list}_ **

Loki could practically hear Thor scoffing from across town.

**[Oh sure, I’m sure all the people whose Xmas lists consisted only of COCK make the nice list ;)]**

Thor walked through the front door while Loki was still plotting his response, a dark, insistent thought having taken root, leaving his head reeling at the possibility of… _no, it wouldn’t be right. He was already taking advantage of Thor… but then, this WAS his only chance…_

“Fuck, that was a long day,” Thor groused, looking oddly cranky considering his usual cheery nature, his hot temper usually the only blot on his otherwise sunny-skied outlook on life. “I’m going to go shower, and then I’m going to eat until I pass out.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Loki smiled sympathetically even as his conscience acquiesced to his need.

Somehow knowing Thor was about to be naked upstairs made it all the easier to be plain about what he wanted.

**_{Just YOUR cock right now though, you certainly made it sound nice enough to make the list… but then I certainly want it enough to make the naughty list}_ **

There was a short enough delay that Loki was all but _writhing_ , sure that Thor was naked by the time he answered. Loki leaned against the kitchen counter, having shooed his Dad away to go pamper Frigga so that he could watch the gravy for him (and lust over his stepbrother in temporary peace), his breath catching as Thor seemed to step neatly into his trap.

**[Seems like maybe there should be a medium list, for nice people who want to do naughty things?]**

**_{Well, in that case, I should have got a medium gift - like, if I’m technically too naughty to have your cock right now, maybe I’m still nice enough to deserve a sneak peek?}_ **

The answer was immediate, and Loki stirred the gravy with ferocious swirls, trying to keep himself calm.

**[A sneak peek??]**

**_{Just a little… preview, shall we say? Like a little appetiser, as it were.}_ **

**[Nothing little here ‘as it were’, and I was kind of under the impression that sending dick pics was the mark of a desperate creep when it came to stuff like this?]**

Loki dropped his head into his hands. It certainly wasn’t Thor who was the desperate creep in this scenario.

**_{You have good instincts. That only makes you hotter, frankly. But the key word you’re missing there is ‘unsolicited’…}_ **

There was a long enough delay that Loki started to think he should send another message, telling him to not worry about it, that he hadn’t meant to pressure him, that he could wait -- although he couldn’t, he couldn’t, _he couldn’t --_ but then his phone lit up.

_Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck._

Loki found a strange sense of calm creeping over him, certain somehow of what he was going to find in Serrure’s inbox, so he took a minute or so to finish the gravy and decant it, and called his Dad back through to retake the reins.

“Dinner ready?”

Loki’s blood did a strange fizzing thing, his skin prickling hot and cold all at once.

He turned to face Thor.

“Uhm yeah, is Odin coming? It’s pretty much done.”

Thor ambled closer, smelling sharp and sweet, his hair still dripping, the scent of his body wash still rising off him like steam.

“Yeah, he’s just rubbing Mum’s feet so I figured our hands might be better for dishing up right now.”

“Good call,” Loki croaked.

There was possibly _(definitely? Oh god, please be there)_ a photo of Thor’s purportedly massive dick in Loki’s inbox, and -- instead of being able to look and drool and fantasise about _fuck, so many things_ \-- he now had to stand and serve dinner with him, then likely sit _next_ to him, feeling that heat radiating from him, knowing that just one tap of his screen away there was...

He helped Thor dish up, hoping he didn’t look as sweaty and twitchy as he felt, and even managed to converse semi naturally as their parents finally joined them.

Dinner passed as something of a blur, his chest wall feeling tender as Loki’s heart spasmed and thrashed around inside him, caught somewhere between terror and excitement.

Thor’s eyes rested on him each time he spoke, and Loki couldn’t decide whether he should stay silent or talk more, Thor’s sky blue eyes a familiar and even beloved weight upon him, but now he could almost feel Thor’s focus on him like a physical blow.

Thor’s attention was like a gift, a kiss, like being _hit_ , and Loki didn’t know if he wanted to run from it and climb into Thor’s lap and beg him for more.

Frigga expressed a desire for a nice friendly (here she gave them each a glare) family game night, and Loki could honestly have placed his head on the table and _wept_.

He just wanted to go upstairs, quietly despair at his lack of self-control, and then gaze upon the doubtless splendour that was Thor’s dick for the rest of the night -- _Was that so much to ask?_

He smiled and nodded along with everyone else and then volunteered to stack the dishwasher, if only to give himself five minutes alone to clear his head ( _or look, he should totally look, he could always jerk off later but once he’d looked he’d have seen and he’d KNOW and more importantly he’d be able to RESPOND TO THOR.)_

Loki watched as Thor drifted through to the living room, fervently making his case for _Monopoly_ over _Taboo,_ while Odin argued for _Scrabble_. Frigga refilled her wine glass before following them through on a sigh.

_Alone. Alone at last._

_But for how long?_

Loki threw himself into stacking the dishwasher in the manner of a whirling dervish, his fingers trembling in anticipation to the point of nearly dropping several different glasses before he finally managed to set the damn thing quietly whirring, its gentle hum the only other sound barring his already winded breaths.

He collected his phone up with one hand, steadying himself with his elbows set against the counter.

_Fuck._

Loki could never take this back if he did this, it was like Pandora’s Box. He’d already jiggled the lock enough to be damn near weeping with want over his best and most favourite person in the world, but if he looked, if he _actually saw,_ then Loki would know exactly what it was he was missing out on… Thor’s dirty words whispering in his head forever, his no doubt perfect dick seared onto his mind's eye and only Thor his _stepbrother_ left to comfort him.

Loki took a deep breath and unlocked his phone.

Thor had always been enough, _would_ always be enough, Loki just needed a little peek at the world he could never know.

He flung open Pandora’s Box -- or _alright_ , Serrure’s inbox -- and blinked at the words just above the little glowing paperclip symbol.

**[Well then, seeing as it’s apparently not unwelcome…]**

_Oh god, oh god._

Loki opened the attachment, and his brain screeched to a halt.

“ _Fuck me…_ ” he croaked hoarsely, before lifting a hand to jam it against his mouth, setting his teeth to the clench of his knuckles as he whimpered, his hips bucking involuntarily, saliva pooling in his mouth as he rocked slightly with his laboured breaths.

_FuckfuckFUCK_.

Thor was _massive_.

Long and thick, with fat veins leading up to the glorious rosy dome, it reached up past Thor’s navel, with Thor’s gorgeous (and equally long and thick) fingers hoisting it back to rest against his belly -- tight and golden and tantalising, as already Loki knew it was -- with water droplets from his shower still clinging to the sharp jut of his hip bones.

Loki swallowed, feeling his body clenching from his jaw down to his ass, his entire form caught up in the impossibility that would be Thor inside him.

This was a mistake. This had been a _huge_ mistake -- _fuck, don’t think about huge_ \-- how the hell was he supposed to look Thor in the eye now? How was he supposed to allow himself to be hugged always knowing he wanted more? How was he supposed to go on being Thor’s brother when he wished he was anything but?

Self-loathing, swift and sharp, lanced through him, slicing straight through the burn of his arousal, leaving him cold and determined.

It was simple.

Loki would get the last few dregs out of this little game he’d convinced himself it would be safe to play, he would let Thor down in the least disappointing way he could think of, and then he’d be the best brother and best friend Thor had and would ever know because that’s what _Thor_ deserved.

He nodded to himself.

He could do this. He’d always have these last few days to look back on with a sad little thrill, but otherwise, he was going to be the stepbrother Thor believed he’d always had, and that was that.

**_{Unwelcome? I don’t think I’ve ever got so hot for anyone so fast in my life. Goddamn it, I can’t believe I did this to myself again, I should have waited to look at this later when I could actually have found time to come marvelling at how fucking gorgeous your dick is, but I’m stuck being ‘social’ at a gathering I can’t get out of. Fuck but you’re mouth-watering though, pretty boy. Don’t be surprised if you don’t hear from me anymore tonight cos I’m gonna be too busy coming hard with my fingers jammed inside myself to type.}_ **

“Lo?”

Loki jerked so hard that he nearly threw his phone across the room.

“ _Thor_ … I… _Fuck_ , you made me jump!”

Loki shoved his phone into his back pocket and hoped like hell Thor hadn’t seen the screen when he’d been flailing about like a startled pigeon.

“Sorry, you were really lost in your own world there, huh? You okay?”

Thor shuffled closer, his bare feet padding against the kitchen floor, still smelling warm and clean, and Loki could almost have folded into his arms and wept with his desperation to just taste him -- not even his dick, not right at that second anyway, but the soft, inquiring smile he always gave Loki when he thought he was acting weird -- his eyes ice-bright and kind on Loki’s no doubt sweaty face.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. Just easily spooked apparently.”

Thor knocked his shoulder against Loki’s. “C’mon, Mum’s almost managed to talk your dad into Scrabble and I just can’t handle another night of them debating what words are and aren’t allowable.”

“Thor,” Loki said as gaily as he could muster up, linking arms with Thor as he recalled his promise to himself about what Thor deserved from him. “I think tonight’s the night we finally introduce the parents to _Cards against Humanity_.”

Thor’s thunderously delighted laughter was almost enough to shake Loki loose of his fevered turmoil as they walked back through to the living room in step with one another.

_Almost_.

Loki swallowed.

He could _do_ this, dammit.

He _had_ to.

++

The next day was all about torture, apparently.

Thor had seemingly decided to start his day with a workout intended to burn off all the extra calories he’d taken in over Christmas, returning from a run just as Loki sat down to eat breakfast. He’d stripped off his hoodie and proceeded to do pull-ups in the kitchen doorway with rain still glistening on his chest, sweat pooling down over his hip bones like a map for Loki’s tongue to follow, all the time idly chatting away as Loki forgot to eat.

He’d finally sprung down with a grin, his muscles gleaming and bulging beneath his flushed, _biteable_ skin and he trotted away, leaving Loki to force his now soggy cereal down his tight throat.

The first message had come only moments later.

**[Woke up wondering what it’s going to be like to sink my dick into you. Was kind of inconvenient cos it’s really hard to force yourself to go and work out when you’re all boneless from coming your brains out. Now I’m going to go shower and think about it all over again.]**

Loki’s honest reply had been all but impossible to hold back.

**_{Fuuuuuuuck, it’s too early to be this turned on - are you trying to kill me or something?}_ **

**[Or something! XD]** had been the immediate response.

Thor had been relatively well behaved for the rest of the morning -- that is to say, he still insisted on being impossibly gorgeous and gushed about all the places he wanted to show Loki on campus and how he had to come and see him _soon_ , dammit -- but the next barrage had begun only shortly after Thor left the house to go meet up with his friends for their belated Christmas lunch.

**[Meeting up with friends but all I can think about is how every girl on here messaged me all sweet and flirtatious, and you came straight at me wanting to know if my hand was big enough to be worth your while. Now I’ve been picturing finger-fucking you all the way over here and I’m too fucking hard to get out of my car]**

Loki had quite liked the idea of Thor wanting Serrure so much that he was too hard to go and spend time with his little minions.

**_{I’m sorry, is the idea of you sitting in your car with your gorgeous fat cock hard for me supposed to make me feel bad in some way?}_ **

**[Feel bad? No. Magically appear facedown happily choking yourself on my dick? Yes. FUCK yes. PLEASE.]**

Loki had sprinted up the stairs and was back in his bedroom -- his door _locked_ this time -- writhing on his belly with his fingers pressed tight to the eager flutter of his hole within minutes.

**_{Damn you, pretty boy! I would if I could, I promise you. Am having to make do sucking my fingers and shoving my own hand inside me cos I can’t be there to sit on yours as it is.}_ **

**[Yeah? You touching yourself for me? You stuffing yourself full at both ends and wishing it was me?]**

Loki’s hands were really too slippery with both spit and lube to respond by this point, but he simply hadn’t been able to leave Thor hanging.

**_{canht type, finers wett, hyoure fuckng me}_** he sent back, all but thrashing against the violent press of his fingers inside himself, his saliva-slippery digits skidding over the keyboard.

**[Fuck yes]** Thor sent back, and Loki squirmed and came all over himself.

He was just laying back, panting and sticky and pulling a face over how much laundry he’d ruined that week already when his inbox lit up again.

**[Well, I just beat off in my car parked in front of my oldest friend’s parents’ house. I can’t decide if you’re a bad influence or a fucking amazing one.]**

**_{Hey, you started it :P besides, I’m the one who just excused myself from the room so quickly that people likely think I’ve got food poisoning or something, and that’s down to you!}_ **

Thor didn’t answer that one, but an hour after his last, when Loki was midway through his excruciatingly boring holiday reading, Thor messaged Serrure again.

**[My friend got these cream-filled doughnut things… now I’m on a sugar high and fucking ACHING to eat you out.]**

Loki flipped his book shut and let himself moan, low and desperate, there in the quiet of his room, rolling his hips back against the chair as though Thor might feel how much Loki wanted to push back onto his tongue -- or his fingers, his dick, his _anything_ \-- from all the way across town at Volstagg’s house.

**_{I like the way you think}_ **

Thor must have been being terribly rude, keeping his phone to hand despite catching up with his oldest friends, his response arriving mere seconds after Loki hit send.

**[Yeah? Cos now I’m thinking how much I want to see your mouth stretched wide around my cock.]**

Loki gave up on any pretence of doing his homework, sitting back and popping his fly open, giving himself space to continue to harden, his own dick rapidly rising in apparent approval of Thor’s plans for him.

**_{I want those big fingers in my hair, your hands fucking steering me down, I want you to choke me on that massive prick of yours}_ **

**[You like it a little rough, gorgeous?]**

Loki groaned, and spat into his palm, smearing the sticky warm liquid about the head of his dick, now standing proud and bobbing gently in the cool air of his bedroom.

**_{I’ve seen those photos of yours, pretty boy. You look strong as well as BIG, I’d like to feel that strength a bit is all, I don’t want you to be a dick about it, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want those hands on me}_ **

**[You want me to lift you up? Want me to hoist you up with my big hands and bounce you on my cock?]**

Thor messaged again before Loki could convince himself to stop squeezing his dick long enough to respond.

**[You want me to hold you down a little? You want one of my hands holding you down while I make you come for me? On my cock… my fingers… my tongue?]**

**_{FUCK. Yes all of that, all of it!}_ **

Thor disappeared for long enough that Loki had long since come -- shaking and breathless -- into the tight vice of his palm, had been to the bathroom to wash his hands and splash his face, his heart only just managing to stagger back into its normal pace by the time that Thor responded.

**[Well, now I’ve jerked off in front of my childhood best friend’s parents’ house AND in their guest bathroom.]**

**_{Dirty boy - are you ashamed of yourself?}_ **

**[Only if you didn’t come too.]**

His knees weak, Loki toppled onto his bed and yelled his frustration into his pillows.

**_{Oh, I came pretty boy. I came thinking about your hand between my shoulder blades holding me down while you did anything you fucking wanted to me}_ **

**[Ok, I really cannot afford to get hard again in this house right now]**

**_{So, I shouldn’t mention that I still spend FAR too much time thinking about how you said I’d never be able to fit your thick dick up my ass, and how badly I want to try even if you’re right?}_ **

There was not quite ten seconds, and then -

**[You’re going to be the fucking death of me. Am turning my phone off until I’m somewhere I can get my ‘thick dick’ out to so I can think more some more about what I plan to do to you with it.]**

Loki’s answer of **_{Spoilsport}_** was met with radio silence, so, assuming that Thor had kept his word and shut his phone off out of sheer self-defence, Loki curled up and had a well-deserved nap.

++

By the time Thor got back, late that afternoon, Loki had slept, showered and was almost all the way to feeling human again. He even felt benevolent enough to not insult Thor’s taste in friends as he came through the door, looking utterly wrung out.

“Nice afternoon?” Loki asked innocently, trying to not focus on Thor’s hands or picture what they’d done while thinking about what Loki wished he would do to him and… Loki cleared his throat. “You look ready to drop.”

Thor shrugged. “It was nice, yeah. Just kind of…” He trailed off, and where Loki had been hoping for signs of underlying arousal, he saw something perilously close to melancholy.

Loki hopped up off of the sofa and padded swiftly over to stand before Thor.

“What’s the matter? Was Sif even more vicious than her usual self or something? I thought you’d come back all smiles and infantile jokes.”

“It was fine, really. I’m just being stupid.”

“Why don’t you tell me what the problem is, and I’ll tell you if you’re being stupid? Your odds are better than normal, what with the company you insist on keeping after all.”

Thor gave him a semi-stern glare and Loki made sure his grin was particularly impish, trying to lure Thor back towards his usual smiling self.

“Volstagg’s dropping out to work for Hilde’s Dad,” Thor said, and Loki waited, knowing there must be more.

Hilde’s dad had been saying Volstagg was a born chef for as long as they’d been together so, although sudden, it was hardly surprising enough to have added the slight downturn to Thor’s usually naturally smiling face.

“Sif’s switching from med school to do law, Hogun’s already studying away at the back end of beyond _and_ he’s already committed himself to working as a camp counsellor during the summer, and now Fandral’s thinking of dropping out to take a gap year after all. I just…” Thor trailed off, his voice cracking oddly where it had risen in pitch and urgency the more he spoke, and Loki stepped closer, rubbing Thor’s forearms until his ( _beautiful_ ) large hands finally unclenched, falling helplessly open.

“I just feel like this is -- Like, natural progression, yeah -- but, like this is the natural dissolution of who we’ve always been?” Thor smiled at Loki, rolling his eyes in self-deprecation but Loki was focused on the tiny quiver at the very edge of that too tight smile and, without thinking, he stepped into Thor’s arms, winding his own about Thor’s shoulders.

“They’ll _always_ be your friends.” He said softly into Thor’s ear and felt bad for how much he enjoyed it as Thor shivered and wrapped his arms around Loki in turn, crushing him tightly to him.

“I know that, I do,” he said weakly. “And I’m so proud and pleased for all of them, it’s just that things change, and I hadn’t really realised just how much moving on without--” Thor’s breath caught, and Loki squeezed him tighter. “-- _Without_ them,” Thor tried again, and continued, “Was actually bumming me out till I was driving home.”

“Thor, I’ve been trying to get those boring idiots off your coattails since I met you,” Loki grinned to soften his words even as Thor growled at him, brows low over slightly despondent eyes. “And I can tell you, no amount of time or distance or tedious career choices is going to stop them from being your friends. You might not see them as often as you like, but they’ll always be there. Trust me, I’d have seen them off by now otherwise.”

Thor grinned at him, the shadows disappearing from his face as swiftly as the sun peeking out from behind the clouds. “You never did like to share,” He agreed.

“Well, why should I have to?” Loki sniffed, happily embracing his more possessive behaviours if it kept Thor smiling and content. “You’re _my_ stepbrother, not theirs.”

“True,” Thor rumbled, his voice low enough to send frissons of delight creeping up Loki’s spine. Then, before Loki could force himself to step away and not make a fool of himself, Thor tightened his grip -- his arms already steel bands about Loki’s ribs -- and hefted him up off of the floor.

Loki squeaked (though he would, of course, deny this later) and clutched at Thor’s shoulders for dear life, only just remembering at the last moment what a monumentally bad plan it would be to wrap his legs about Thor’s hips for safety.

“I’m so glad I’ll have you with me next year,” Thor breathed into Loki’s hair, and he practically melted against him, helpless against the tidal surge that was Thor’s gloriously warm affection for him.

_This is what you’re risking, this is who you’re casually toying with regardless of the consequences,_ his brain whispered sharply. _SHUT THE FUCK UP,_ the rest of Loki shrieked back, letting Thor hold him up, his toes barely scraping the wood floor below him as Thor swayed, holding him tight.

“You won’t even have to wait till then,” Loki promised fervently, making up for deeds Thor wasn’t even aware needed atoning for, winding his arms even tighter around Thor’s neck. “Just let me get my stupid winter break assignments done and the first shitty bit of term out of the way, and then I can _easily_ be up with you for a weekend by the end of January.”

Thor squeezed him, one long, solid crush and sighed. “I guess I can wait a lousy month,” he mock-grumbled as he pulled back slightly to look into Loki’s face, his smile threatening to take over his face once more, his prior sorrows all but chased away.

“You’re lucky it’s going to be _that_ long,” Loki smirked, his tone as threatening as he could make it with Thor’s arms around him, “I’m going to make you sick of me.”

“Never happen,” Thor said smugly, and Loki rolled his eyes, squirming to get down, his body desperately telling him that it couldn’t take the warm, slightly sour tang of Thor’s sweat anymore, not knowing what it was that he’d done to get himself hot and sticky so many times that day.

“Put me down, you oaf, you’re getting powdered sugar all over me -- did Volstagg bring the whole bakery for you guys to eat or something?”

Thor squeezed him tighter, grinning smugly. “Ask me _nicely_ ,” he purred, “or I’ll wipe my face on this nice sweater of yours… pretty sure there’s still some cream or jam or something still on my chin someplace.”

For all the following minutes of squirming and loudly objecting ultimately ended with Thor getting (lightly) kicked in the shins, nearly outing Loki’s perversions for all their family to see as Thor’s strength and proximity set Loki’s dick swelling beneath his thankfully long and baggy sweater, Loki wouldn’t have changed it for the world.

He saw Thor off to _freshen up_ \--- like Loki didn’t know he’d come squirming, nervous and turned on as fuck at least twice that afternoon -- with a flip of the bird and a powerfully smug expression at the restored sense of happiness surrounding Thor.

Loki might not always act the way he knew he should -- and catfishing Thor for his own personal gratification didn’t count because it _didn’t_ , okay? -- but he’d be damned if he’d ever let Thor be _actually_ unhappy, dammit.

After the ten minutes or so that it took to convince Loki’s dick that rubbing himself up against Thor whilst physically trapped against him was _not_ the best use of his time, Loki’s phone lit up and he didn’t know if he wanted to smile or _scream_.

He checked Serrure’s inbox.

**[Finally home, fucked my fist in the shower thinking of you, New Years can’t come fast enough]**

_Well, that much was certainly true._

**_{Wish I’d been there to wash your back for you… and maybe replace your fist with my face}_ **

**[Fuck, do NOT get me hard again, I need to go get dinner]**

Loki had volunteered to cook that night (or at least help, Odin was a terrible backseat chef) and he couldn’t afford to check his phone often enough to make it worth Thor’s while, let alone struggle through cooking dinner with a raging hard-on.

**_{Me too, I’ve ruined quite enough of my underwear for you in one afternoon - temporary ceasefire?}_ **

**[Just so long as it’s short term - not sure I can sleep without picturing you riding one part of me or another… you feel like telling me more about how you wrecked your underwear for me later on?]**

**_{It’s a date ;)}_ **

Loki felt a pang as he typed the words, but it bought him the necessary time to sort the food out (with his father three steps behind him clucking over every bowl like a particularly suspicious chicken) and time to just be _Loki_.

He laughed at Thor’s stories about his first semester at college (even the ones he’d already heard, it was just nice to see him smiling), he helped Frigga with her bonsai, and he even managed to bask a little in Odin’s praise of his cooking without it getting too cringey.

The high part of his night came when he spread himself out on the rug before the fire to doze and listen to his family laughing at some live Stand-Up comedian or another, only to find Thor had followed him down. Before long they’d fallen into their old past time, and Loki had been a molten ball of bliss curled over the mat, his head resting on Thor’s thigh as he plaited and re-plaited Loki’s hair, over and over until Loki was practically purring.

It was a habit they’d fallen into during Loki’s run-in with mono, back when he was fourteen. He’d felt too awful to do more than stagger to the sofa each day, and for every hour that he’d been able (assuming he could nudge Odin aside) Thor had set about pampering Loki back to health. Loki had not enjoyed being cosseted and fussed over, thank you very much, but by the time he’d been back in full health, he had been entirely unwilling to give up Thor's fingers petting him.

Fortunately, Thor had felt much the same, and they’d spent many a comfortable evening quizzing each other before tests, complaining about their general friend group (okay, that might just have been Loki) and watching TV, all with Thor’s hands tangled in Loki’s dark hair.

It was an entirely different type of torture than the rest of the day had been, and Loki’s body hummed with awareness even as he couldn’t help but radiate comfort and pleasure. His thoughts jumbled together, torn between the need to snuggle closer to his favourite person in the world and just suck up every ounce of love he was constantly offering him, or…

Well, that need involved getting closer and sucking as well, but he tried to not focus on the idea too hard, lest his body give him away.

By the time he toddled off to bed, he had almost forgotten Serrure’s _date_ with the _Tilslutte_ messaging app.

_Almost_.

Thor fired message after message of what he wanted to do to Loki (eat him out until he screamed, for the most part) and what he wanted Loki (well _Serrure_ , the bitch) to do to him (muffle said screams on his dick.) By the time Loki fell asleep he was utterly wrung out from so many orgasms, yet entirely unsatisfied because what he actually wanted, quivering spent body or not, was only across the hall from him and a million miles away.

+++

Thor was _insatiable_.

The days leading up to New Year’s Eve became a blur of filthy messages, and the warring urges to crawl into Thor’s lap and beg for forgiveness versus the urge to crawl into his lap and beg for him in general.

It didn’t feel like harmless fun anymore -- alright, so he’d never truly believed it was harmless, but he’d thought the only real victim would be _him_ \-- but Thor messaged him every time he had a dirty thought about holding Serrure up against a wall and pounding into her at the moment the clocks struck twelve.

He messaged Loki when he wondered if it was safe for them to meet at a party, unsure if he’d be able to commit to any plan but to make him come apart screaming, and he didn’t much fancy being interrupted.

He messaged Loki wondering what he’d come harder on his tongue, his cock, or his fingers?

That query had caused Loki to curl up in a ball in his armchair and yell into a cushion with such volume that Thor had heard him from the sodding kitchen and had stuck his head through into the living room to ask if everything was alright.

Loki had just about managed to fob him off with a story about Sigyn being difficult about their plans for NYE -- a good bit of verisimilitude he felt, considering his plan to have her ‘cancel’ on him right about the same time Thor would be getting stood up by Serrure -- but the twinkle in Thor’s eye as he said ‘Uh-huh, _sure_ ’ and slipped back through to the kitchen made Loki think he’d come across almost as entirely unhinged as he felt.

He took a day to do all of his holiday assignments at once, telling himself it would free him up for the rest of the break as well as stand him in good stead with the parents for clearing his docket, making it easier to visit Thor at MCU, ideally even earlier than he’d hoped.

Of course, he hadn’t quite counted on what Thor might do when left at a loose end for the day.

Loki managed to ignore the first few flashes of his screen from out of the corner of his eye, but by the fifth he was sweating and shaking slightly with anticipation and nerves, snatching at the phone the next time it lit up.

His eyes swept through the messages, glutting himself before he could force himself to slow down and savour the burst of _sharphotwant_ that each separate set of words invoked.

**[Fuck, so many of my winter plans have changed... just think, with a little more notice we could have planned this so I could have been filling you up right now]**

**[Your turn for a busy day, huh? Hmm, I wonder if I can turn your own tricks back around on you and make you sneak off to touch yourself in the guest bathroom of your friends’ house?]**

**[I was thinking about that first message you sent me again, I don’t think anyone’s ever been as into my hands as you... my muscles sure, people have even assumed I’d have a dick worth their time just down to my height... but you’re the first one who wanted my hands on them enough that it made me actually fucking WANT my hands on you.]**

**[In you. Fuck... what’s it they always say in old movies? I’m gonna take you apart with my bare hands... I can’t tell you how much I want to fill you up, make you come on just my fingers...]**

Loki opened the fifth message and whimpered as he saw the attachment clip flashing.

**[Guess I’ll have to settle for making myself come on them for now, knowing you’ll come on them later]**

Loki tapped to open the image so hard pain briefly jolted up through his nail bed, the feeling forgotten in an instant as he swallowed, his mouth dry as he stared at the image of Thor’s hand, still shaped as though he only just released the grip on his dick, his knuckles dripping with come.

His head swam for a moment, his vision tunnelling on the image of Thor’s broad golden fist spattered with creamy ribbons that looked somehow more real than anything Loki had ever seen in his life, the urge to lick his phone’s screen oddly overwhelming.

The joke had been on Thor there though, not that he would ever know it, but it turned out that it was much easier to concentrate on completing his essays after a long nap, having come so hard he bit his tongue.

Loki finished up his work with enough time to have Serrure message Thor apologising for being distracted enough by just the thought of his cock to have left her charger behind before venturing out for the day.

They discussed Serrure’s punishment for leaving him hanging -- Thor having been good enough to keep up his stream of filthy thoughts despite _his_ sociable obligations -- during the course of the evening, and Loki had had to fight to keep from squirming, Thor’s slightly smug mask of general impassiveness somehow almost as arousing as the words he was covertly texting him.

Loki had to do some quick side-stepping when Thor ever so subtly mentioned wishing that he could watch after Loki promised him faithfully to ride his own fingers. He coyly reminded Thor that he could see in person soon enough, and then proceeded to melt into the sheets while Thor told him precisely how to fuck himself, until he was simply too wrung out (and frankly sticky) to type anymore.

He volunteered to help out at Frigga’s shop again in the hopes that keeping busy would help him from inadvertently revealing himself to Thor. He (foolishly) hadn’t counted on Thor’s willingness to help his mother combining with his dislike of being parted from Loki.

Frigga tasked them with deliveries once again, and they spent the day crammed in a van that always smelled just slightly too much like stale flower water, and that categorically refused to play anything but the oldies station whether they were caught in traffic or zipping along nearly empty streets.

It was, embarrassingly enough, possibly the most perfect day Loki could remember in a _long_ , long time.

They spent their time in traffic talking about everything from Loki’s plans for senior year (most involving revenge on Victor, although he abstained from informing Thor of his methods) to whether Thor’s insistence that red peanut M&M’s were superior to the rest (incorrect, it was clearly the green ones if any). Loki tossed the M&M's into Thor’s mouth as he drove, whereas Thor almost tenderly proffered them before his lips each time Loki asked, fighting down a blush and telling himself it was necessary in order to keep his eyes on the road as he took his turn at the wheel.

They were too busy -- cursing traffic, marvelling at the empty roads, bickering and bonding over anything and everything in between -- to check their phones.

There had been a moment when Thor was out of the van getting petrol that Loki had abruptly recalled that his phone was sitting, silent and heavy in his pocket and, thinking back on the wonderful slow hours he’d spent with Thor already that day, he reached into his pocket and switched it off.

Serrure could always apologise to Thor later for her hours of radio silence, but he’d be damned if he’d share Thor with her just then.

They dropped off their cargo with smiles that would likely put the rest of Frigga’s delivery crew to shame, grumbled their way jointly through the paperwork and were still home in time to shower before dinner.

Loki left his phone off with a defiant glare at it as he plugged it in to charge, dark and silent on his bedside cabinet, before striding off to shower.

Sure, maybe Thor was messaging right now or waiting for one, but Loki had had a really nice time dammit, he was going to bask in it while he could.

He left it by his bedside until he came to bed that night, exhausted after his dad had finally won the chance to beat them all at _Scrabble_ , and he crawled into bed too tired to face his dual identity.

This restraint proved -- naturally -- to be both a blessing and a curse.

Loki turned his phone on as he lay in bed the next morning, and watched several messages land in Serrure’s inbox.

**[Hey beautiful, thought about you a lot today]**

Loki checked the timestamp.

Thor had messaged him roughly around the time they’d each headed upstairs to shower. Shrugging off the vague sense of irrational hurt, Loki looked to the rest, wondering if Thor had just wanted something hot to wank to, or if he’d really been with Serrure all the time it had seemed he’d been present with Loki.

**[Busy day again? Me too, pity though, seems like any day can be improved by imagining eating you out until you’re begging me to fuck you]**

Loki released a long breath through his teeth, grimacing even as he smiled at the next message.

**[Damn, you're really not there, was hoping it was just you playing hard to get ;) will just go jerk off in the shower the boring way then, hope you’re having a good day too]**

He hadn’t messaged again since. 

Loki thought about Thor complaining to their parents about Loki’s ‘corpse toes’ after their feet tangled together under the table the night before. He’d bitched about how he didn’t know how Loki got anything done with such shitty circulation, all the while rubbing Loki’s feet between his until they were toasty with Thor’s innate warmth.

He smiled to himself, feeling foolish and victorious all at once for regarding it as a win over Serrure and her hold on Thor.

_That he'd deliberately cultivated._

Groaning, Loki made himself reply, his thumb sluggish as he forced it over the keypad.

**_{Sorry pretty boy, ended up dragged into a million different things yesterday, had planned to message you for a nice little orgasm or two around bedtime but I passed out so hard I didn’t get a chance}_ **

Thor responded before Loki had managed to convince himself that a shower would go a long way to making him feel less divided, the words slamming into him with the force of a cannonball.

**[It’s all good... just makes the wait to finally meet you all the sweeter. Can’t believe it’s tomorrow. Can’t wait to finally touch you.]**

_Shit._

_Shitshitshit._

It was tomorrow. He was supposed to fucking meet Thor _tomorrow_.

For a moment Loki let the fantasy play out -- _meeting Thor at a party, seeing the surprise on his face as he stepped close and admitted what he’d done, who he’d pretended to be, all for just a taste of what it would be like to be wanted by Thor. Thor would look torn between anger and astonishment, but then he would smile, and he would move to pull Loki to him and_ \--

Loki shook himself free of the fantasy.

No matter how delicious the dream, telling Thor that he’d been tricking him for days would most likely end in anger, not an embrace.

Sighing sadly, he forced himself to stick to the plan.

**_{Fuck yes it is, can’t believe I’m finally going to get those hands on me... and hopefully all the rest of you on me too}_ **

**[I promise to put any part of me you want anywhere you want it, gorgeous]**

Loki considered how much time head left before they needed before heading out to help at Frigga’s and how much time he had left ( _little, so fucking little time_ ) to enjoy Thor.

**_{Tomorrow seems suddenly very far away - why don’t you run me through your plans and I’ll let you know which ones I like and which ones make me come so hard you may have to cover my mouth, so we don’t get arrested tomorrow night?}_ **

Smiling, Loki squirmed his way back into his pillows, his phone already lighting up as Thor proceeded to answer him in deliciously explicit detail.

Maybe they could just be a _little_ late.

++

They could _not_ afford to be even a little late, as it happened.

The deliveries had been too important and too many to risk running late, so the vans were long gone by the time they arrived, and so were faced with the worst of all jobs -- front desk duty.

Frigga put them both on the desk, freeing her and her staff up to make the last-minute concoctions that were pouring into the shop like a flood. Frigga usually made her money at this time of year making arrangements for festive functions and parties, along with the odd wedding, but it seemed that this year everyone and their mother had decided that flowers were the best way to say ‘thanks for putting up with me for yet another year’ -- or at least that was Loki’s theory on the matter. He sure as fuck would require flowers and expensive gifts to put up with these indecisive arseholes for longer than it took them to pay and get the fuck out of his queue.

Worse (for all it might actually also be the highlight of his day) was having Thor crammed into the tiny space behind the desk alongside him, answering questions with a smile that seemed sunny enough but only Loki knew really meant ‘I will crush your skull if you don’t decide faster you puny imbecile’ -- okay, so Loki might have been projecting slightly there -- and invading Loki’s personal space with every other breath.

He steered Loki from his path with a large palm on either side of his hips when he needed to step around him in their cramped quarters, he leaned into Loki each time his mother passed through to use the phone, and he was somehow always, _always_ already in the pathetically tiny supplies closet when Loki needed to go in there.

The worst time ( _Best? Let’s go with best, who was he trying to fool here, besides himself, his family, oh and Thor!?_ ) was when Loki had been in the supply closet by himself, admittedly _not_ searching for the sunflower message cards as he was supposed to be so much as just taking ten seconds to _not_ rush around like a blue arsed fly (as his father would have put it).

Thor had appeared after only a moment, and instead of being cross at the loss of his fleeting solitude, Loki found himself leaning back against Thor’s chest as Thor’s hands settled at his hips, pausing in their act of steering Loki to one side as Loki’s head fell back to rest against Thor’s shoulder.

“What if,” Loki began in a deliberately hushed tone, more suited to fairy tales and bedtime stories, “we _didn’t_ go back out there? And we just stayed in here forever, and no one got their damn flowers because they don’t deserve them when they’re this last minute anyway. Not that we’d care, what with being closet people now.”

Thor hummed, the sound of it soft and amused even as it reverberated thrillingly up through Loki’s spine, and he could hear the smile in Thor’s voice as he replied, “Living on staples, dressed in only ribbon and tissue paper, we’ll have our own little world. We’ll even invent a new language with no word at all for flowers.”

It was just too daft and delicious for Loki to be able to resist, so he turned and buried his face in the front of Thor’s sweater, clinging to the scratchy material of his apron as he groaned and snuggled closer.

“You always know just what to say,” he sighed, letting Thor take his weight as he wrapped his arms around him in turn. “But I don’t think I could give up Dad’s pot roast for staples so I’ll have to face the music at some point. How much longer is it?”

“Nearly there,” Thor murmured soothingly as he ran one of his gloriously broad palms up and down the cobbles of Loki’s spine with gentle sweeps until Loki was almost boneless against him. “Just over two hours ‘til close.”

There was an indignant squawk from Mira, still stuck on the desk with both of Thor and Loki’s queues to deal with as well as her own, and Loki burrowed closer, making cranky noises into the warm breadth of Thor’s throat.

“I’ll never make it ‘til then,” he whined, and Thor laughed, stepping back even as he cupped Loki’s nape, smiling into his face with such fondness that Loki’s knees almost buckled.

“Yeah, you will. I swear I’ll carry you out of here myself come closing time if it comes to it, leave no man behind and all that stuff.”

Loki sighed and stepped back, reaching out for the sunflower cards with the sort of unerring accuracy that told him he’d be having detailed nightmares about this shop for decades yet to come.

“What were you here for?” Loki asked briskly, hand poised to snatch up anything Thor asked for and Thor blinked, blushing.

“Oh, I uh, didn’t actually need anything really. I just come in here and fetch more blank cards any time it starts getting to me too hard out there.”

Loki gave him a mock glare and shoved him backwards out of the closet. “I’m telling Frigga _and_ Mira,” he informed him haughtily and ignored how Thor chuckled as he fell in step behind him.

“Hey, I wasn’t the one who wanted to stay in there forever and leave Mira to deal with everyone here all by herself.”

Thor’s words came just as they took their places behind the front desk again, Loki presenting the sunflower card to his customer with an apologetic grimace worthy of an Oscar.

Mira stared daggers at them both. “One more awkwardly long visit to the supply closet for the two of you and you’re covering my New Year’s Day shift... _and_ I’m telling Frigga!” She hissed, and Loki felt an odd clench of victory deep in his gut when he realised that she thought they might be doing more than time-wasting in there together.

“We’ll be good,” Thor said promptly. “We’ve each got plans for New Year’s, right Lo?”

Something clawed its way up Loki’s throat, and he swallowed it back down, speaking the lie in its place with something far too close to ease.

“Yup, he’s got a date, I’ve got a friends party _and_ ,” he channelled some of his disappointment into (possibly unfair) malice as he glanced across at Mira, “I believe _you_ have double pay for manning the store on a holiday, so don’t go pretending you’d trade that cash in, missy, ‘cos I’ll take that shift and work it hungover just to spite you.”

Mira raised a single brow and looked across to Thor.

“He’s a little worn out,” Thor said apologetically, and they spent the next hour or so bickering between themselves over who was the most immature of the three.

It helped the time go by, but it did little to ease the ache that was spreading up from Loki’s stomach to his chest.

By the time he finally slumped, exhausted and relieved, into the passenger seat of Thor’s car, he was entirely unprepared for Thor’s sudden bout of polite curiosity.

“So, what’s the plan tomorrow for you and Sigyn? Still just going as bodyguard or are you thinking along the vengeance lines still?”

_Actually, my plan is to stay home after Sigyn ‘cancels on me’ (not hard as she’s skiing with her parents) and ideally end up spending the night with you, after Serrure cancels on you at the last minute, and you need someone to console you._

“Uh, yeah, the first, I guess? I don’t know exactly who's party it is but it sure as fuck won’t be Victor’s, so I guess it’s just a case of being between her and any fork-tongued cowbag who dares start on her when we’re trying to have a good time.” Loki cleared his throat and managed to not croak when he continued with, “And you? Where are you taking your hot girl? Busy night for a date night.”

Thor shrugged, his hands flexing on the steering wheel in a way that derailed Loki’s nerves for a moment as each several key parts of his body all voted in favour of being the next thing Thor’s hands squeezed that way.

“More of a hook-up than a date,” Thor said simply, and Loki wasn’t sure if his casual tone made him angry or triumphant.

“Cool,” forcing the level tone of vague enthusiasm into his voice cost Loki more than it had taken to not kill every customer who changed their mind midway through their order that day, and Loki tossed a quick smile Thor’s way. “All the fun with none of the fuss. Happy New Year indeed.”

“Yep,” Thor answered, frowning at the road before them and popping the _P_ so hard that Loki felt oddly unable to ask him any more about it. He was sure in a reality where he _wasn’t_ catfishing his beloved stepbrother, that the protocol for hearing about your best friend's likelihood of imminently scoring should involve a great deal more questions, but he just couldn’t bring himself to utter the words.

Loki slumped against the window and affected a light doze the rest of the way home, certain that it would be more believable than any attempt he could make to sound enthused about Thor’s doomed hook-up.

++

**_Oh my god, I can’t believe I have to say this but--_ **

_No, no, too vague._

**_Shit, I’m so sorry, I thought I’d be back in time but--_ **

_Fuck. No. Too inconsiderate... although wasn’t that the point? Thor wasn’t supposed to still want to hook up with her after the fact._

Loki slapped both palms over his face and groaned into his hands.

He’d deliberately deactivated his alarm in the hopes of miraculously sleeping through the majority of the day, but it was now gone 10am on December 31st, and Loki had only a handful of hours to figure out how to dump his brother.

_How did it get to this point so fast?_

He was supposed to have had days to enjoy this, enjoy _Thor_ , but it felt only a blink ago that he’d first seen Thor’s profile on the app and now here he was, already having to toss him back into the entirely unworthy dating pool.

_Well, time flies when you’re sexting your brother, I guess._

**_I’m so sorry, but I ran into my ex, and we decided to make a go of it..._ **

Loki stared at the words, pulling a face at the hideous cliché of it all. He wanted it to be very much Serrure’s fault so that Thor wouldn't still be lusting after her for months to come, but he also didn’t want to bum Thor out so hard that they couldn’t celebrate New Year’s together.

He slumped back against his pillows and strove to calm the staccato throb of his heart as it flailed and clamoured behind his ribs at the thought of letting Thor go, no matter how tenuous or (above all) _fictional_ the hold he currently had on him.

He just needed to calm down and take things _slowly_. 

_Loki had hours yet dammit, he could afford to mull over his word choice for a while--_

His phone lit up where it lay abandoned on his bedding.

_\--because of course it did._

He picked it up, hoping for a ski lodge update from Sigyn, but already knowing he’d see the _Tilslutte_ inbox notification.

**[Hey, Beautiful :D can’t wait to see you tonight]**

Loki rolled onto his belly and buried his face in his pillows, reminding himself sternly that there was no point in crying over milk you had deliberately spilt.

++

Loki spent the early part of his afternoon mediating Thor and Frigga’s ongoing Megadrive battle. It had seemed like something of a gag gift when the self-pronounced plant goddess had opened her gift from Thor to find the latest reboot of the old gaming station, and Loki had giggled along with the rest of his family when Frigga had shrieked and bounced around like her inner five-year-old had been given a pony. He’d been not quite twelve when he’d first met Frigga and Thor, and he’d had no way of knowing how _ugly_ their gaming history had been.

By 3pm he’d watched in amazement as Frigga had set a high score on Sonic that he knew he’d never get close to, and had marvelled as she’d inflicted fatality upon fatality on a howling and enraged Thor in _Mortal Kombat._

“My warrior queen,” Loki’s dad had said smugly from his armchair, seemingly blind to everything but his Sudoku up until that point, and it had been both adorable and repulsive all at once.

The plan was to eat a late dinner -- their parents were cool with them drinking a little within reason but not on empty stomachs -- and then to each depart for their varied events, the whole family more than happy to celebrate the New Year together at brunch the next day.

Loki fielded questions about Sigyn, saying he was waiting on a reply from her as to what time to meet and where they were heading, while carefully keeping his eyes off of Thor.

Their parents bickered amicably over whose turn it was to drive to their best friends’ party, Loki mentioned a few of his offhand plans for vengeance should Doom be fool enough to make an appearance (powdered laxative in his drink, the standard fall-back) and Thor prudently did _not_ mention how the majority of his night’s plans revolved around his being balls deep in a girl he’d been sexting all holiday long.

Loki excused himself for a pre-party nap, intending to simply sleep as long as he could, and skip over the guilt dripping into his belly with every breath.

He curled under his duvet, still dressed and miserable, finally set upon a plan as he dragged a heavy thumb over his screen to wake it.

**_{Sorry, this has been the craziest day already! My friend’s friend is having a party, I don’t know the address yet, but I can send it to you later and then meet you (and your hands :P) there?}_ **

Job done, Loki sighed and curled himself into a ball and repeated to himself that this feeling wouldn’t last, over and over until he fell into an uneasy doze.

++

He woke, too warm and with a headache, with only just enough time to get showered and dressed -- _for a party he wasn’t even going to, what the fuck was he doing_? -- and meet the others at the dining table.

Loki’s hair was still trickling droplets down his neck, his favourite top sitting against damp skin as he rushed to scarf down Odin’s admittedly excellent pre-party frittatas (an excellent stomach liner, he’d informed the boys with a twinkle in his eye) when Loki suddenly realised something had changed.

Thor was dressed much as he had been that afternoon, only the lingering scent of his body wash hinting that he’d even bothered to freshen up for his evening of carnal activity.

Squinting at Thor’s t-shirt and trying to remember if it was the same grey top or merely a similar one, Loki abruptly noticed that both of their parents had a glass of wine to accompany their meal.

Odin caught his look of confusion and grinned impishly.

“Your stepbrother kindly offered to be our driver, so I get to drink this year after all.”

Frigga instantly started in on what was obviously a well-worn topic, stating that it only delayed Odin’s turn as the designated driver to the following year, which Odin was adamantly decrying as he beamed back at her, each of them comfortably oblivious as Loki turned to Thor.

“How are you pulling that off? Are you going to double back for them at the end of the night or…?”

Loki let his question tail off, trying to imply with carefully pronounced blinks that no matter how much they drank, their parents would likely notice if Thor showed up to collect them stinking like a one-man orgy.

“Nah, my plans fell through. I’m just gonna go with them, they were squabbling over a dodgy coin toss, so it just seemed easier.”

Loki’s throat went tight, his windpipe abruptly thick with barbed wire, the phone he had stubbornly ignored out of guilt now weighing like a lump of lead in his back pocket.

“Oh but… I mean, that’s -- that’s too bad. You should have said, but you can come out with me and Sigyn if you want?”

Thor smiled, looking slightly tired and Loki felt a spike of grief, wondering if he was responsible, if something about his reply had made it clear to Thor that he was going to be stood up, and that he had slept his way through Thor needing him.

“I’m okay thanks, Lo. I don’t want to spoil your murder twin routine, I know you’ve been plotting for days. It’s okay though, turns out Sif’s going to be there, networking or some shit her dad says will help once she gets through law school. I’ll go be her arm candy, feed her shots when she’s not schmoozing scary old dudes and shit.”

The bottom dropped out of Loki’s stomach.

He’d somehow hurt Thor before he could even figure out how to dump him, _and_ he wasn’t going to get to spend New Year’s with him.

“Cool, I mean, as long as that’s what you want, then _great_. Glad we’re all back to having plans.”

Thor smiled and nodded, but still radiated something stilted and _wrong._

_Disappointment_ , Loki’s mind unhelpfully supplied, and he had to shut his feelings down entirely, a quiet shell of himself as he fought the urge to confess everything, letting the gentle wash of conversation roll over him as he bolted his heart in place.

This was how it was always supposed to be -- a quick slice of what it would be like to be wanted by Thor, and then no more. The assumption that they’d spend their New Year’s Eve together had just been greedy, he’d had what he wanted. Thor had simply preempted him (somehow), and now they would go back to how they had always been, bar Loki allowing himself the odd nostalgic dream of what it would have been like to keep their date and have everything he ever wanted.

_Greedy,_ he told himself again.

He helped clear the table on autopilot, laughing numbly at the expected cracks about impending hangovers and the glory that was going to be Odin’s New Year’s Day fry up, and maintained the mask so well that he was actually surprised to watch Thor shrugging into his favourite red jacket.

“Do you want me to drop you off at Sigyn’s or the party or somewhere?” Thor said as Frigga bustled back and forth grabbing matching accessories while Odin hummed quietly and contentedly to himself, standing by the door.

“No, I -- I’m good, thanks.” Loki forced himself to smile. “She said she’d pick me up, so I’ll just wait here, and if I don’t see you guys later, then I’ll see you in the morning.”

“We’ll see you next year!” Frigga proclaimed with the sort of unholy glee you can only experience when you work extremely early hours and suddenly have the opportunity to go out and get wasted without worrying about getting up the next day. Loki smiled at the expected dad joke (whether it came from his step mum or not) and presented his cheek for a kiss when demanded, squirming when his dad surprisingly insisted on one too. For a moment he thought Thor was going to demand one as well, but he merely laughed at Loki’s horrified expression over Odin’s sudden display of paternal affection. Then, with a jaunty salute, he’d swept them all out the front door, and was gone.

Loki stood, alone and abruptly exhausted, in the middle of the living room, watching as the car’s lights disappeared off into the dark.

“Well, that’s that then _,”_ he croaked to himself if only to break the silence.

He lifted his phone from his pocket with embarrassingly shaky hands, getting his passcode wrong twice in a row before he was able to finally open the damned thing.

**[Hey, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I can’t make it tonight. Family stuff came up and pretty much has a hold of me until I go back to college. I hope you find someone else to celebrate with, I’m sure you’ll have fun either way. Sorry about this, have a Happy New Year. Thor]**

“ _Fuck_ ,” Loki said, with no one to blame for his current guilt and misery but himself.

++

He’d read Thor’s message to Serrure with barely three hours to go till midnight, and Loki had managed to burn through one of those simply staring at the _reply_ button, grieved and guilty and _gutted_ by the sudden end to their imaginary tryst.

Loki considered actually attending the party he’d told Thor he’d be at, if only for access to copious amounts of alcohol, but just the thought of being social, and having to pretend like he hadn’t spectacularly fucked himself over was too heinous to truly contemplate.

He’d spent a good amount of time swaying before the liquor cabinet, pouring himself enough varied shots that the bottles almost looked as though he’d never touched them by the time he’d finished forcing down swallow after bitter swallow of spirits that weren’t really to his taste.

They gave him just enough of a buzz to decide that he might as well go along with his imagined plan for the evening, now that his actual _stupidnaïvehorriblyidealistic_ plan had fallen through. He tripped his way upstairs, not so much tipsy as he was too pissed off with himself to take care, darting into his room to put music on loud enough to feel it in his bones, and stretched out on his bed.

He couldn’t spend his New Year’s on Thor’s dick, but he could certainly spend it crammed full of his fingers and imagining that he was.

Blood pounding in time with the beat, alcohol swimming in his veins, Loki scrolled back through his messages with Thor, reliving every moment in order as he writhed and sobbed on his hand until he came, shattering apart with the freedom to finally shout Thor’s name as he did so.

He didn’t know how long it was, but by the time his fingers were cramping too hard to keep pushing into him, Loki was sticky and sleepy and sated enough to finally feel less like crying. He dragged himself up, only just able to force himself into a quick wipedown with a warm, wet washcloth, before he staggered back to turn his music off, tumbling into bed with enough endorphins buzzing in him to be generous.

He curled into his still sweat-damp bedding, lifting his phone up to gaze at Thor’s last message with a bittersweet little smile. He didn’t have to worry about Serrure being a bitch anymore, Thor had been the one to let go, he could afford to let her say her goodbyes.

**_{Can’t tell you how sorry I am that we couldn’t keep our date. I hope your family stuff went okay and that you have an amazing New Year. Spending mine wishing I could be with you - under you, full of you, the usual - Happy New Year Thor x }_ **

Loki shut Serrure’s account down with a regretful sigh, torn between wishing he’d never created her and a desperate, aching gratitude to her. 

He checked the time.

Barely any time left before the old year died and the new year began, and he couldn’t think of a better way (now, at least) than to sleep his way through it all.

Settling down into the warm embrace of his bedding, Loki imagined he was standing in the supply closet at Frigga’s store once more, Thor’s arms about him, and let himself drift off into bittersweet dreams.

++

Loki opened his eyes, groggy but warm, unsure as to why he’d woken until he heard another firework go off outside and he grunted, shifting further onto his belly and grumbling into the pillows.

“Did you mean it?” Thor said quietly, somewhere behind him.

Loki jerked, his heart almost bursting in his chest at the shock of it, his breath strangling a scream and trapping it in his throat. He would have shot up, spun around to face Thor, but Loki found there was a sudden inexorable pressure between his shoulder blades as Thor pressed him firmly back against the mattress.

“Th-Thor?” He managed to gasp beyond the sudden sharp spike of his nerves, body almost vibrating with shock. “What... what are you doing?”

“ _Did_ ,” Thor repeated slowly, steel in his tone, a seeming dagger clenched between his teeth as he pushed down harder in response to Loki’s startled shifting, “You. Mean. It.”

“What? What do you mean, Thor!? I--” Loki cut himself off mid yelp as his waking brain finally caught up to his terrified one.

_Ah. Fuck._

Thor knew.

“Yeah,” Thor said stiffly, as though he'd somehow heard Loki’s realisation. “You know what I mean--”

Loki did.

“--so I’ll ask you again, ‘cos I’ve got to know.” The mattress shifted and Loki -- fully awake now, almost all traces of his prior buzz burned away in the wake of his fright -- realised that Thor was kneeling on his bed, one denim-clad knee caught in the moonlight just at the edge of Loki’s vision. “Did you mean it?”

Loki still didn’t know what Thor was asking him exactly, but, at this point, Loki figured he owed him honesty even if it cost him Thor’s high regard.

“I did, I -- I _do_. Every last word of it.” Loki swallowed past the ashes in his mouth as the pillows made every ragged breath seem to bounce back at him, roaring in his ears. He blinked back tears he had no right to. “I just... I just wanted to know what it’d be like. To be wanted... _like that_. By _you_.”

Thor’s fingertips seemed to spasm against the shivery, too hot skin of Loki’s back, jerking against him.

His throat clicked, loud in the silence between distant fireworks and Loki heard him wet his lips, the sound of it setting goosebumps rippling across his skin.

“I was talking about the apology.”

The words of Serrure’s last message seemed to light up one by one behind Loki’s eyes -- _can’t tell you how sorry I am_ \-- and for all he hadn’t meant it as an apology for his behaviour, he hadn’t meant for Thor to discover his trick either.

“I meant that too. I meant all of it.”

_Fuck, he was just giving away truths left and right now. He needed to calm down and let Thor do the talking for a bit._

“Do you hate me?” His lips asked without permission.

Thor snorted. “ _No_ , you little shit. I don’t hate you.”

The pressure at his back suddenly lifted, and Thor sat down with a sigh. Loki jerked in place with shock as Thor’s weight settled onto his thighs, abruptly realising that Thor had been kneeling astride him all this time, and he turned his head further into his pillows to stifle the whine that wanted to rise from him, like a whistling tea kettle vibrating above the flame.

“Meant every word, hm?” Thor said, his voice caught between pensive and something Loki couldn’t quite place, low and almost preoccupied, his hand suddenly settling low over the small of Loki’s back, spreading so that his fingers rested against the upper curve of Loki’s ass.

_Oh please. Oh fuck, yes. PLEASE_.

Loki had slipped back into bed naked, having only just found enough willpower to vaguely clean the excess sweat, lube, and come from himself post self-indulgent wank session before dropping off to sleep. Now powerfully aware of just how very naked he was, Loki forced himself to lie still, ignoring the dual temptations of both pushing his ass back into Thor’s open palm, and grinding his rapidly filling dick into his sheets.

“Y- _yeah_ ,” Loki breathed, biting back a whimper as Thor’s hand flexed ever so slightly, more of his palm now cupping Loki’s backside.

“So, every time _Serrure_ told me she was stuffing herself full and wishing it were me, _you_ stuffed yourself full... and wished it was me?”

Overwhelmed by Thor speaking the words as much as he was by the fact that _something was actually happening_ , Loki turned his face away and let something caught between a wail and a howl muffle itself in the pillow.

He felt Thor’s laughter vibrate through him where he sat on his thighs, whimpered as he felt Thor shift back, his knees taking more of his weight off of Loki as he unconsciously tried to spread his thighs beneath the covers.

“You alright there, Lo?” Thor’s voice was horrifically smug, and Loki would have rolled over and kicked him in the face for it, were he not entirely more interested in the way Thor’s hand had moved to the centre of his ass, his splayed fingers above the bedding pushing interestingly against his crack.

“ _Yes_ ,” Loki hissed, desperate, furious and relieved beyond words all at once. “Yes, I’m alright you smug _bastard_ , and _yes_ , I fucked myself with my fingers pretending it was you, okay?”

“Every time?”

“ _Every_ time.”

“And that’s --” Loki felt Thor rise back up onto his knees, shuffling back even as his hand moved up to edge fingers under where the duvet rested midway down the slope of Loki’s lower back, “-- what you did earlier?”

Loki allowed himself to shift finally, squirming on his belly as he raised his arms, caging himself in with his elbows braced against his pillow, nodding and gasping into his bicep.

“I’d figured I’d likely spoiled whatever game it was that you were playing,” Thor said, his palm spread over the small of Loki’s back, hot and heavy beneath the soft cotton of his bedding. “But then Serrure’s message came through, and you sounded so sort of _wistful_ \-- like you planned to spend your night thinking of me, the way I was trying _not_ to think of you -- so I went back to the hellhole that is Facebook and looked at Sigyn’s posts, hoping for selfies or something that might let me in on whether you were being even _slightly_ sincere.”

Loki made a soft noise of regret, but it was a fair point.

“And there she was,” Thor continued, his hand stroking back and forth over Loki’s spine, coming teasingly closer to his ass with every motion, “happy and smiling and _miles_ away at a ski lodge with her parents, and I realised you _hadn’t_ been planning on leaving me high, dry and alone after all, and that maybe you’d even planned to strand us _together_ , and see what came of it?”

Loki hid his face against the smooth skin of his inner arm, squirming and clutching at his hair as Thor’s hand moved, stroking over his ass and down, _down_ to lay open against the back of his now exposed thigh, the action having drawn the blankets away from Loki’s thrumming skin.

Thor swallowed hard.

“So I told Sif about my cancelled date -- minus your catfishing me, naturally -- and how I’d like the chance to see it through, and _stellar_ best fucking friend that she is to me, she said she’d bring our parents home, which won’t be far off now because Mum was already flagging when I left, so we don’t have much time…. Which brings me to my main question.”

_Anything, ask me anything, you can HAVE anything, fuck, please_

Loki could hear his breaths coming shorter and faster as Thor skated his splayed hand back up Loki’s thigh until his thumb rested just shy of his cleft.

“Did you fuck yourself,” Thor ground out as Loki whimpered, fighting to not writhe, “and think of _me_?”

Nodding frantically, Loki keened as Thor thumbed his cheeks apart, swearing as the pad skidded over the residual slick of lube.

“You’re still _wet_ ,” Thor breathed, and Loki sobbed, pushing his hips back unthinkingly, crying out as Thor’s thumb tip slid over his hole, catching there for a second as he writhed and choked on his need, his cock hard and leaking against the sheets.

“Fuck.” Thor snarled succinctly, positioning his hand so that the next time Loki arched and shoved his ass back Thor’s thumb simply sank into him, both of them freezing as he slid inside Loki to the third knuckle. “That’s what you did when I sent you the photo… it’s what made me think you weren’t in it just to trick me.”

Long past the point of being able to articulate himself with any degree of coherency, Loki pushed back again and again onto Thor’s thumb, shaking and too turned on to follow what he was saying.

“Wha..? Did what?” He muttered, feverish and single-minded.

“Pushed back like that.” Thor pulled his thumb back, already thrusting back in with two fingers before Loki could finish wailing at its loss, two of Thor’s thick digits rather more like three of Loki’s, startling him into holding still, gasping and shivering as Thor ponderously pumped his fingers back and forth through Loki’s still thankfully slick ring.

“You clearly seemed to want a dick pic, and I couldn’t see how you could possibly be planning to use it against me.” Thor spread his fingers apart, and Loki shuddered, sweat breaking out all across his skin as it felt like a minor shock passed through him, sizzling in place as Thor continued. “So I took it and made sure I stayed close by when I sent it, waiting for you to look at it. Waiting to see how you’d react, and at first, you looked so nervous I came to the conclusion you really _didn’t_ want to see, that you were tricking me for some pointless plot of yours--”

Loki felt Thor’s free hand settle on his other cheek, parting them, holding him wide so that Thor could watch himself finger-fucking Loki in the moonlight splashing over the bed, and Loki whined, pushing back again.

“--Yes, _fuck_ , just like that, Lo. That’s what you did. I left you alone, waited for you to stop clattering about in the kitchen and when I snuck back to the dining room, I was just in time to watch you pick up your phone, look at my dick and _push back_ , your fucking knuckles between your teeth, moaning like you wanted me in you right there, right then. Right in the middle of our fucking kitchen.”

“ _Yes_ ,” Loki sobbed, finally finding his voice. “I wanted it so much, wanted _you_ so much.”

Thor growled and pulled his fingers out only to shove them back in _hard_ , and Loki couldn’t help but twist and moan, his hips pressing back into the rough push of Thor’s hand, not yet as full as he’d been on his own fingers, but all the more desperate for it because it was finally, _finally_ Thor inside him.

“I didn’t know that though,” Thor grunted, lifting his free hand and readjusting his stance atop Loki’s bed. He dropped forward abruptly, braced onto an elbow, blanketing Loki, his knees spread about Loki’s thighs as his fingers still rammed and squelched inside him, his hot breath at Loki’s ear. “All I knew was that you were fucking _catfishing_ me, but all I could think about was how much _I_ wanted what you said _you_ wanted to be true.”

Thor’s fingers had always been thicker, heavier somehow than Loki’s own delicate hands, and the weight of them ramming into him as Loki felt Thor roll his hips in time with his was almost enough to make him cry, arousal and confusion colliding thickly in his skull.

“M’sorry,” he sobbed, Thor drawing his fingers back to switch to his two middle digits, slightly too dry as he pushed them slowly into Loki’s hole. “I never meant to really trick you, never meant to _hurt_ you… just wanted to feel what it was like for a while, then let you go. Never thought you’d find out… I -- _how_ , how did you find out?”

Thor twisted his wrist, rubbing his knuckles against Loki’s flinching rim and swore, leaning up and away again, and Loki followed him up, whining, cold and unwilling to be abandoned. Thor pushed him back down with his hand heavy between Loki’s shoulder blades once more. He pulled his fingers free with a hiss, like it was his own body that clutched and tried to pull his fingers back inside, and Loki heard himself whimpering, begging Thor not to stop, _please_ , _don’t stop, please, please, PLEASE.._.

Thor shushed him, slapping Loki’s backside with enough force to startle him into instant stillness and silence. Loki’s cock leapt against his belly as he heard Thor spit once (onto his fingers he assumed) and then again, directly onto the open clench of his hole, and Loki spasmed, feeling like he could almost come from that alone.

He felt one finger slide into him again, pumping steadily, joined by another after only a few strokes, and Loki somehow knew what was coming -- wanted it, _whined_ for it -- and spread his thighs as far as he could, quivering and forcing himself to stay as loose as he could as he felt Thor’s ring finger prodding up against the other two.

“You’re so soft and wet,” Thor breathed with a filthy sort of reverence to his tone. “I tried this on myself the other day when you’d been talking about how you’d had one hand in your mouth, one hand jammed inside you wishing both were mine, and I couldn’t do it. Even with lube, everything was so hard, like my own body had closed itself for business against me, no matter how much I wanted to feel what you were feeling. But you’re so… _open_ for me, still so hot and tight, but slick and giving, like there’s nothing you want more than any part of me you can get inside you.”

Loki pulled his arms in tighter about him and whimpered, letting Thor’s _headyheavyPERFECT_ words drift over him. He was almost entirely focused on where Thor was slowly pushing and pulling his fingers in and out of him, pressing a little harder with his third finger every time until -- _finally_ \-- it breached Loki alongside the others, spreading Loki wide.

_Oh FUCK_

“Oh _fuck_ ,” Thor unknowingly agreed.

He turned his wrist, letting Loki’s rim blossom wide all around him, and Loki whimpered, pushing back once more, desperate to feel Thor’s knuckles shoved up against him, and Thor growled quietly, pleased and hungry sounding.

“Yeah, like that,” he murmured, “fucking _work_ for it, Lo.”

Loki groaned and buried his face in his pillows, only to jerk upwards, yelping as Thor slapped his arse again, his body squeezing tight at the abuse, and they both groaned at the sensation.

“Don’t,” Thor panted, “fucking _hide_ from me. I want to see you, I want to _hear_ you, dammit.”

Loki flung out a hand, pointing at his bedside cabinet.

“Please,” he whimpered, “Need it, need _more_ so I can get more of _you_.”

He let his face drop back onto his crossed wrists beneath him, smugly pleased to feel Thor stretch and lean away from him with his free hand scrabbling to open Loki’s drawer, choosing the more difficult way rather than pull his fingers free of Loki’s body.

Thor loosed a stream of hot, fervently uttered curses as he apparently found what Loki was indicating, sitting back to slide his fingers out of Loki, and breathing as hard as if he’d had to run downstairs and back to get it.

There was a familiar snap of plastic, then an equally known slick sound, and Loki fidgeted, his shoulders rolling as he lifted his hands to tangle them into his hair once more, gripping tight as though he might somehow be able to keep himself from flying apart that way.

Thor touched wet knuckles to where Loki twitched, unhappily empty, rubbing them back and forth as Loki pleaded with soft, wordless noises, shuddering in place.

“I honestly couldn’t tell if you _actually_ wanted me,” Thor murmured, dipping his fingertips teasingly in and out, rubbing in circles as Loki wriggled and moaned in delight. “Figured you must because you kept messaging, but then I couldn’t make sense of your long game, you seemed to want my hands on you… _fuck_ \--” Loki’s rim quivered and he sunk all three thick, slick digits back inside with a warm, wet squelch that made Loki writhe just to hear it. “--Gods Lo, _fuck,_ but you look so good taking my fingers, you’re so fucking _tight_.”

His voice broke on the last word, and Loki found himself covered again, Thor’s clothed chest pressed along his back and side, the contrast of being bare beneath Thor’s bulk causing Loki to whine and shove back harder. Thor ducked close, bracketing him even as his hand plunged back and forth, driving his fingers into Loki as Thor dropped onto his elbow again to whisper hotly into Loki’s ear.

“I couldn’t help myself, that day when you said you wanted me to hold you down, to choke you on my dick, to use my strength against you.” Thor’s fingers were ramming into him hard enough to force a soft cry from Loki’s throat, his dick rubbing back and forth in the pool of pre-come he’d leaked onto the sheets beneath him, as he hung on Thor’s every word, almost on fire with pleasure. “I came home, and you were so fucking sweet to me, and I could practically see the messages floating over your head -- you wanted my fat dick up your ass, you wanted me to hold you down, you wanted me to lift you _up_ \-- and I couldn’t fucking _resist_ it.”

Loki shifted slightly, aligning his arm to where Thor lay braced on his, wrapping long fingers about the thick, veined length of his forearm, gasping as he felt Thor tilt in turn so that he could mouth at Loki’s jawline past the tumble of his hair.

“You made,” Thor groaned, guttural and almost _snarling_ as he set his teeth to the hinge of Loki’s jaw, “the most _perfect_ fucking sound when I lifted you off the floor. You were clinging to me, and I just wanted to turn around and fuck you through the wall ‘til you were making those little sounds over and over. Then you tried to get away, and I just squeezed you _tighter_ , let you struggle a bit, and you got so _flustered_ , and I knew then for sure that you weren’t lying about wanting me even if you were lying about everything else.”

Thor pulled his fingers back, rubbing and nudging along Loki’s ass, and he realised what Thor was trying to do, feeling Thor’s little finger tucked close as he pushed all four fingers back and forth over Loki’s hole.

Loki was used to four fingers, had come squirming atop his own not an hour before in fact, but Thor’s were just _so much bigger_.

“Came so fucking hard in the shower after, imagining giving you everything you want.” Thor pressed just hard enough to nudge inside, and Loki stilled, panting. “Spent days trying to show you how much I wanted the same thing. Do you have _any idea --_ ” Thor’s fingers sunk slowly inwards, and Loki leaned into Thor, tilting his face until their mouths were almost touching, Thor’s words a humid breeze against the corner of his lips. “-- how it felt to sit there with your head in my lap one hour, and have you message me how much you wanted my cock in your mouth the next, knowing all I had to do was cross the bloody hallway and _here you’d be_.”

Loki moaned, low and long, as the broad ridge of Thor’s knuckles finally met the tight clench of his rim, and then it was Thor who moaned, his shiver transferring into Loki.

“Damn near snapped and took you up against the shelves at Mum’s shop. Just wanted to slam that cupboard door shut, lift you up and fuck you right there, with Mira and everyone waiting listening as I made you come, you were so sweet and warm in my arms, _fuck,_ but I wanted you so much.”

“Wanted you too, so much, _so much_ ,” Loki’s voice bounced and broke as Thor’s fingers picked up the pace, the quick wet sounds of his fingers diving into Loki’s body somehow so much louder than when Loki ever touched himself, and he writhed at the delicious shame of it. “Wh-when you sent that photo of your come on your hand I just wanted to crawl across the hall and lick your knuckles clean.”

Thor hummed, low and pleased.

“That’s when I was thinking about you coming from just my hand,” he all but purred, and Loki couldn’t help but nuzzle at him, desperate for a kiss even as he never wanted Thor to stop. “You gonna come from just my hand for me now, gorgeous?”

Loki nodded, frantic, his skin ablaze as his blood fizzed and burned with every thick stab inside him, his cock slick as he rutted back and forth, leaking all over himself.

“I will, I will, I’m… I’m _nearly_ …” he babbled, and Thor started pumping even _harder_ , his knuckles colliding with Loki’s rim with such force each time that it gave him a quick, sweet burst of pleasure and pain combined, his hole bruised and needy all at once as he thrashed and pushed back against Thor’s fist.

“I remember the first day after I knew -- after you nearly fucking choked at just the thought of being on my cock -- I was trying to figure out if you really wanted me--”

“I do, _I do_ …” Loki sobbed, breathless and so, _so_ fucking close.

“--I know baby, I know you do.” Thor nipped at Loki’s jaw, before soothing it with quick, sweet kisses, open-mouthed and hot, his tongue slipping over the tiny hurt. “But I didn’t know then, I was testing the water, then you said you wanted to be my little sex puppet,” Loki whimpered, still more than happy to assume that role, “and I said I wanted to cover your mouth and shove my big dick in your tiny, sweet little hole here--” Thor flexed all four fingers inside him as he said this, and Loki wailed and thrashed. 

“--And when I got to your room, you looked so fucking _delicious_ , like I’d caught you just moments before you could make yourself come, and I knew no matter what, I wanted you whether you were teasing me or not. I knew I wanted that mouthy--” he drove his fingers in faster and Loki struggled to catch his breath, “-- _cheeky_ , fucking _amazing_ , gorgeous, smart as a whip, little stepbrother of mine who I’ve always--” Thor was panting now, his words ragged as he put as much of his strength as he could behind his hand as Loki sobbed and wailed beneath him, “-- _always_ loved so fucking much, only I never knew I could want you so much too, Lo. And I do, I want you _so fucking much_ , and I--”

But Loki couldn’t make out his next words, as a well-timed thrust of Thor’s fingers collided with his prostate at almost the same moment Thor said how much he’d always loved him and… _well_.

Loki simply flew apart.

He came, choking and gulping as he pumped hot burst after burst of come into his sheets, somehow spilling like he’d not done so in weeks, Thor’s fingers feeling like a redwood inside him as his hole clamped down, struggling to hold him steady against where his prostate sparked and sang with sensation, and the only word Loki could manage to wail between gasps was, “Thor… _Thor_ …”

He slumped forward, whimpering as an awful lot of signals crossed themselves, his body replete with pleasure even as his backside suddenly throbbed and ached with Thor’s hand still pumping inside him.

“ _Fuck_ , Lo…” Thor hissed, and Loki whimpered as Thor pulled himself up and away once more, his overheated body still somehow cold without Thor pressed tight to him.

“Do you have any idea how hot that was?” Thor braced a shaking hand at Loki’s hip for a moment before slowly easing his slippery fingers free of Loki’s sore, spasming clasp. “Do you have any idea how fucking _beautiful_ you are when you come like that for me?”

Loki whined and writhed again, his hole woefully empty for all he felt deliciously overused. He yelped as Thor abruptly seized him, jerking him up onto his knees, legs still wide-flung and shaking, his thighs quaking as he realised how exposed this left him, his tender backside resting against Thor’s groin.

Shifting onto his elbows, Loki let his head hang low, moaning as he felt Thor grip his hips, one hand still slick and hot from being inside him, and Loki almost purred at the filthy delight of it.

Thor pulled Loki’s ass back against him, groaning as Loki’s asscheeks made a wet noise against each other at the force of it.

“Dreamed of you like this,” Thor panted, unashamedly driving his poor trapped cock against Loki’s ass as Loki quaked and moaned, wishing Thor’s clothes a million miles away so that he might simply ram his way inside him, sore backside be damned. “Dreamed of you under me… on top of me… thought about you sitting on my _fucking… face_ …”

Thor’s words were dissolving into grunts, and Loki dug deep for the energy to push back, watching over his shoulder to where the moonlight and streetlights barely combined to show him more of Thor than a flash of his bared teeth and the burn of his eyes on Loki’s.

Loki bit his lip and whimpered, shoving his ass into the gathering violence of Thor’s thrusts.

“Nothing… _None of it_ … lived up to seeing you now, to watching you come for me.”

Thor’s hips were battering at him now, ramming Loki forward so that his elbows skidded on his sheets, his knees burning with the friction of it, the denim of Thor’s crotch rough and rubbing at Loki’s tender skin deliciously.

“It’s all for you, want you so much,” Loki let himself sound as broken as he felt, his eyes catching Thor’s in the sudden light of a firework outside, “Fuck me… please, I want you so much, _Thor_ …”

Thor slammed his hips against Loki’s rear end with desperate savage force, once, then twice, before toppling over Loki’s back, panting and already grabbing at Loki with greedy hands even as he crushed him to the mattress.

“L- _love_ you,” Thor gasped out, his hips still jerking, and Loki groaned, thrilled at the feeling of Thor bucking against him still, filling his underwear in place of Loki, true, but still coming against him, _because_ of him.

He struggled to turn over, Thor’s hands tugging him round to face him, jerking him close, legs twining together, Thor’s slippery hand skidding over Loki’s waist as Loki wrapped his arms around Thor’s neck.

“Love _you_ ,” Loki growled back, because it was true, had _always_ been true, and would always be true. Whether this was simply an interlude or a jumping-off point for the rest of their lives, nothing could unmake this moment because Thor was finally, _finally_ kissing him.

There was a brief, breathless eternity of sobbing moans, fighting to somehow drag each other closer than their atoms would allow when a desperate, sullen throb made itself known to Loki, and he broke away, already urgently whispering.

“Don’t… don’t leave me empty,” he managed, shaking in Thor’s arms, the sudden imbalance between being too full and utterly empty having crept up on him to the point where he was almost tearful.

He did sob -- just a _little_ \-- relief and gratitude warring with the throb of use as Thor reached down to slide his still slick middle finger back inside him, and each of them sighed at the slow glide of possession once again.

They lay like that, Loki’s arms still flung high about Thor’s neck and shoulders while Thor’s wove down around his ribs and torso, feeling almost cocooned in each other’s warmth as they kissed and breathed together.

“I’ve… I’ve got to know,” Loki murmured between long, drugging kisses. “You knew for… _fuck_ , like most of the time I was trying not to give myself away and just _jump you_ \-- what gave me away?”

Thor grinned in a way that would usually make Loki want to punch him, but this time he merely tightened his grip and leaned in to bite him a little, with a growl.

“Remember when I told you I wanted to come inside you for New Year’s?” Thor rumbled, squeezing Loki close to him and pumping his finger ever so gently inside him again, his smile increasing at the mewl it earned him. “You choked on your drink.”

“Mm,” Loki conceded, his focus wavering between knowledge and being allowed to suck Thor’s tongue again. “Still can’t believe you sent it from the dinner table, you dirty-minded reprobate.”

“Says the guy who checked it midway through lunch with his grandparents.” Thor chuckled and kissed Loki’s retort away before he could speak it. “Well, I ran around the table to _Heimlich_ you or whatever you needed, was pounding you on the back, when I looked down and saw my own face smiling up at me from your phone, down on the floor. My face, and my words, saying what a good New Year it’d be if I was inside you.”

“ _Fuck_ ,” Loki muttered, as much for the mental image as much as for not realising Thor had seen. “I thought that was Grandpa Bor slapping me on the back, no wonder it was so forceful, you must have been furious.”

“Furious… Confused… Hurt,” Thor agreed with a tilt of his head and leaned in again to kiss Loki before the grief could fully strike. “But mostly confused. I couldn’t figure out why you’d be trying to trick me that way, I mean once I looked at the picture -- I mean it’s _you_ , just with that app thing, right? -- You were barely even hiding from me, so I figured I’d see what you did next, try to figure out what you were after, but all you wanted to do was talk about how much you wanted me… sort of blew the door off, y’know?” Thor leaned back so that he could look at Loki full in the face. “There was never a time when I was like ‘oh, it’s Loki, I don’t want that’ -- it went straight to ‘fuck, it’s Loki, I want _Loki’_ and then everything you said just made me want you more.”

They kissed again, sighing blissfully into each other’s mouths before Thor started pressing tiny kisses up the line of Loki’s jaw.

“Once I figured out you wanted me too it made everything better, but I knew you’d never leave Sigyn hanging in her hour of need, so I just figured you were -- I guess -- doing exactly what you were doing, enjoying what we could be, but with no intention of taking it further.”

Loki threaded his fingers through Thor’s hair until he could steer him back to look directly into his eyes, still so blue in the moonlight.

“I _promise you,_ Thor -- if I’d ever thought there was the slightest hope of your wanting me there’d have never been time for you to sign up to that app. You’d have just woken up and found me in your bed, I swear. I never meant to hurt you, I just wanted a tiny taste of what it would be like to have _this_.”

“Mmm, fuck do we ever _have this_ now, gorgeous,” Thor growled, and Loki’s dick decided he’d rested long enough, twitching interestedly as Thor shifted so that Loki lay more beneath him. “The way I see it, so long as you keep your grades up there’s no reason you can’t use that travel pass to come see me every other weekend.”

Loki was about to point out that he could keep his grades up in his sleep when the room was suddenly awash with light and the sound of gravel crunching came from outside.

“ _Fuck,_ ” Thor said succinctly. “Did I mention there was a good chance that they were _right behind me_?”

He was already easing his finger out of Loki as he made to wrap his legs around Thor in denial, shaking his head and trying to draw Thor back down to him.

“Don’t go,” he whined, already reliant on the exquisite pressure that was Thor lying atop him, shamelessly clinging to Thor’s shoulders. “Stay with me, I can be quiet, I _swear_.”

“I. Don’t. Want. You. To. Be. _Quiet_.” Thor pressed swift biting kisses to Loki’s lips with every word even as he freed himself, sitting up with Loki’s wrists pinned back against the pillows. “And it’s too early for them to know, _yet_.”

Loki couldn’t help but pout, so far past the point of caring if he came across as needy that he honestly considered begging.

“But tomorrow,” Thor said, his tone suddenly molten, dripping with sultry intent. “After brunch, I’m going to kindly volunteer to drive you someplace -- to see Sigyn maybe,” Thor dipped down low again to speak against Loki’s mouth. “And then we’re gonna park up somewhere, and I am going to fuck you through the backseat ‘til you cry.”

The front door slammed, and Loki heard Frigga laughing downstairs.

“ _Promise_?” He breathed, already desperate with hours to go in between.

“Lo, consider it my New Year’s Resolution.”

Grumbling, Loki watched Thor climb back off the bed, grabbing his jacket up from the foot of the bed and folding it over his lube-slicked hand to hold before his come-damped crotch.

“Do I look like I came all over myself finger-fucking my little stepbrother into a new year?” He asked with a grin, and Loki pulled a considering face.

“Probably slightly less than I look naked and covered in my own come from said finger-fucking?”

Thor’s eyes were hungry, heavy as they raked over where Loki still lay splayed against the covers.

“Yeah, I think I’m going to tell them you’re asleep and not to come in here.”

“Solid choice.”

There was noise on the staircase, so Thor -- with a last longing look -- swiftly let himself out of Loki’s room, closing the door behind him with a click.

Loki struggled up, his whole body utterly wrung out with repeated pleasures, yanking his covers as straight as he could, before diving down again, affecting a pose that suggested deep sleep just in case Thor couldn’t dissuade his dad from peeking in to check on him.

He heard Odin and Frigga come up the stairs, talking quietly and laughing softly together, and he felt a surge of affection for the pair, even as he quietly wished them to the moon.

“Oh, hey guys - Happy New Year.”

Loki grinned at Thor’s bleary tone, heard him tell them how he’d only been home a little while himself but that Loki had been out for the count when he’d looked in on him, and how they’d all have to ask him about his night in the morning.

He quickly fixed on a story to share during brunch -- about terrorising Victor, obviously -- and waited with bated breath, his fingers crossed beneath the pillows until he finally heard them wish Thor goodnight a move away down the corridor to their own room.

There was a moment’s silence then, before Thor’s door clicked quietly shut in turn and Loki felt himself deflate a little. He understood what Thor meant about it being too early to share what they had with their parents -- they didn’t even have a name for it yet, though Loki could think of a good few right off the top of his head -- but that didn’t mean he felt any less alone right then.

A sudden thought occurred to him, and Loki beamed wide enough to hurt his face, forcing him to wrestle it down into a slightly less alarming display before he could put his plan into action.

He wriggled across -- pausing to cluck and briefly stop to straighten his bedside drawer where Thor had rummaged through it with the gentle touch of an angry bull -- before settling back smugly against his pillows, prize in hand.

He lay there in the darkness for a moment, before his phone’s screen lit up to show Thor smiling at him, rumpled and damp, clearly having stepped briefly under the shower before tumbling into bed, his blond hair leaving water trails all across his pillows.

“Hey,” Thor said, hushed but so visibly delighted that Loki had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from beaming right back at him.

“So,” Loki launched right into it, his haughty inquiring tone entirely at odds with the way he let his eyes rake over Thor’s face, starved for him despite less than ten minutes having passed since he left Loki’s bed. “When you were sitting in your car with your cock in your hand, talking about wishing Serrure was there face down on your dick… you were really wishing it was me?”

Thor’s sunshine smile warped, his new grin bending until it sizzled when his tongue darted out to wet his lips, his smile _filthy_ as he began to explain to Loki _exactly_ what it was he’d been wishing for, thinking about him, and Loki knew it was going to be the best fucking New Year _ever_.

**Fin.**

**Author's Note:**

> Brief Note: Fast forward two weeks and the only flaw in Loki's visit to campus is how much his thighs ache, having spent the entire weekend with them flung up over Thor's shoulders. They make long-distance work for them and then they manage to get their degrees despite fucking like bunnies every spare moment they have. Odin and Frigga figure it out long before they confess and thus there is no drama, only teasing and cringing forevermore. In short, they live happily ever after.
> 
> Additional Note: XD lol thanks so much for the lovely reception guys, I've come to add an additional coda due to everyone asking about the closet in Frigga's store -- it definitely DOES get used. Loki volunteers them both to cover the shop during the holidays at some point, just them. He waits until there's a lull and, crossing the shop with a sly look, makes a huge point of locking the door and dragging Thor into the closet with him for a bit of afternoon delight. He deliberately waits until he knows Thor is on the brink and breathlessly wonders aloud if he'd 'actually' locked the door or if he only pretended to, and if there's now maybe a queue out in the store, all listening to Thor pounding Loki blissfully into the cupboard door. I'll leave it as reader's choice as to whether you all think Loki's lying about the lock or not but there you go ;) the cupboard DEFINITELY comes in handy ;D xxx


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